Friday, January 01, 2021

DURIAN WHITE COFFEE

Flavoured coffee beverages are incredibly popular among the young and restless, because if one taste is good, more must be better, and pushing the envelope flavour-wise is best.
And surely adding something to a beloved local variant is a grand idea?

Just think of what the twizzle-head ahead of you at Starbucks ordered. Pumpkin raspberry mocha with blueberry sprinkles?

So with great interest I examined a product at my favourite grocery store in Chinatown. Resolute, ab initio, that I would not purchase any. Hell ain't frozen yet.

It's a very fine product.


猫山王榴蓮白咖啡
['maau saan wong lau lin paak gaa fei']
Musang King Durian White Coffee.

Um. Malaysian white coffee refers to beans roasted with a touch of margarine, which facilitates a caramelized effect. In Indonesia, white coffee is a lighter roast. Musang is the Malay word for the civet-cat, or Asian palm civet, which is a coffee fein-shmecker. Also called a luwak. Durian is the "king of fruits", which proves that royalty is a horrid form of government, bring back the guillotines, and up the republic! Cleanse it with fire.

I am not a fan of durian. I've had it, it's tasty and intriguing, but I see no reason to either search it out or add it's haunting perfume to anything at all.


Combining it with coffee crystals, fake creamer, a hint of palm oil, and sugar, in convenient insta-use sachets handy at the office is pushing the envelope too damned far.


Did I already say 'um'?
Um again.


Probably the ideal gift for those relatives you seldom visit.
Or friends who live in Berkeley - Oakland.



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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dude, that product has "pandemic lockdown" written all over it.

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