Friday, May 18, 2012

FRAPPOO!

I suspect that tomorrow the badger will be eating jook in C’town again. Probably fish slice jook, with a fried dough stick. Ideally, that would be followed by a chilled Vietnamese coffee, but unfortunately the places that have both jook and fried dough sticks do not offer that.
Mmm, nice cold and milky! With ice!

Starbucks is not a substitute, nor a rational alternative.
And this is NOT because there is a policy barring pipe-smoking badgers from entry – they have a sign that informs the unwary that they are a non-smoking badger environment – but because froofy coffee drinks made by slackers for slackers are both unpleasant in taste and immensely fattening.
I cannot remember the exact figure, but I think I read somewhere that the average frappoo contains about ten million calories, maybe more, which would account for the fabulous jelly rolls of so many hip and with-it folks in the general vicinity of ‘Bucks.

Gotta keep your energy up, so have another frappoo.
It’s your fifth one today. But who’s counting?
The barrista finally knows what you like.

Frappoo – the perfect cap to a delicious lunch of salad with zero-fat dressing.
Pipe-smoking badgers do not eat crap like that.
And will not drink frappoo.

I don’t think we have even one salad bar in all of Chinatown.
That explains why so many of the tourists look ravenous.
There’s nothing to eat!




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