Naturally I followed the news reports since the first puff of white smoke. While also doing stuff on other open tabs. Reading overseas reports, commenting, studying early mediaeval folklore after watching a Monty Python piece, and casually drawing. We've got a new vicar. Habemus papam. This was followed by a flaky egg tart from the snackies gifted by our landlady yesterday. Why is the new pope never a Cantonese American woman? They are notorious for providing food gifties. My apartment mate tends to do the same thing.
When shopping she buys me meat products or cheese.
Erroneously, she believes I'm too scrawny.
It's high time. Make it happen.
She shops at Trader Joe's, I shop in Chinatown.
So if you see fruits and vegetable here, that was me. I distrust white folks supermarkets, and know for a fact that none of the green things we both like are available at such places. Which is why there is an entire aisle at chaindrugstores devoted to American digestive ailments.
I suspect that if there were more than two Cantonese women living in this building I might be obese, which is the natural state of white people in America. Both of them are slender, btw.
Unlike most Caucasians in North America, I tend to eat with restraint. So while I do like things like pizza and potato chips, and am intellectually very fond of bacon cheese burgers, cheesie poofs, and fried sticks of butter on a stick (Midwestern fair food), I do not snack obsessively on those things while plonked in front of the teevee vicariously participating in sports.
Neither do the Cantonese women in this building. One would suspect that many Americans have Cantonese women in their families encouraging them to have another bite, but obviously that's quite impossible. Sad, really.
For one thing, most kwailo just aren't interesting enough to merrit that attention.
Dutchmen somewhere on the spectrum are unpredictable, however.
Poke him with a pastry, and see what he will do.
Oh look, he painted a herring!
Give him cookies!
Yeah, no, I have no idea why so many Americans are overweight. All I can do is voice mad theories about bacon making everything better and cheesie poofs being a mother substitute. As well as trying to guess which of the passers-by is most likely to die of a heart attack before they're in their thirties.
By the way: we Dutch Americans invented the donut. If we had known what the rest of you are like, we wouldn't have, and instead would have worked on diet pills back in New Amsterdam. Or something with broccoli. Bacon-wrapped ozempic.
A further by the way: what little I have seen of televised sports indicate that the products most advertised are beer, junk food feasts for the whole family, big bags of salty greasy snacks, diet pills, and insurance for your house, car, and mobility scooter.
Plus carbonated beverages, video games, and medications.
Mmm. Perhaps there is a message there.
Besides 'Go Warriors!'
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
No comments:
Post a Comment