Wednesday, November 16, 2011


All cigar smokers agree: dog-people are nicer than people-people. By which they apparently mean that it is better to socialize with folks who have a dog on a leash than with anyone who keeps another person on a leash.
That seems to be the gist of it.

I was standing at the wall having a quiet pipe-full near the cigar smokers. Normally I stay out of their conversation, as I do not have much to contribute to discussions of sports or investment banking. Neither of those subjects are part of my world.
I may look like a member of the one percent, but that's primarily attitude.
I just lack the intemperate anger and nihilism of the ninety nine.
Oh wait... sports are a ninety nine percent thing too.

What I'm saying is, I have no idea how the conversation turned to dogs. But leashed dogs are far less embarrassing than people. Especially when you take the ten-inch spike heels into account, and perhaps nothing else on than fishnet stockings and a collar. That is ALWAYS an issue in San Francisco, where we only have one or two warm months out of every twelve.
Goosebumps, no matter how velvety the skin, are NEVER attractive.
Whenever I see goose-bumps I always feel like enveloping the afflicted party in a nice warm blanky. I've only got a few of those, not enough to go around. And one has to be selective about sharing a nice warm blanky.
Ten-inch heels might rip the blanky. Admittedly, ten-inch heels and fishnets probably look stunningly hot hot hot yowza, but the studded collars and leashes are a discordant note.
And given a choice, I would want the person inside the blanky to be petite and feminine, rather than over six feet tall and butch.
Small misses can be gorgeous in heels and fishnets. Large men, not so much.
That's just a personal observation, I'm NOT being judgmental!
Oh, and discard the spiked collar and the leash.
As well as the hairy flab and paunch.
That ain't my thing either.
I am selective.

It's that pipe-smoker personality, you see.
Calm, contemplative, with good taste and discretion.
We have the blanky, but we're not sharing it with just anyone.

I enjoy my mid-day pipe-smoking break.
Often the cigar smokers say such interesting things.
They're truly in another world, and they lead such unusual lives.

Note: All remarks about collars do NOT apply to pearls. A pearl collar is in excellent taste, and even it is the only garment, there is NO possible objection.
If you're NOT wearing pearls, a terry cloth robe with those fishnets and stilletos is advised.


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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You hang out with CIGAR smokers?!?


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