SADISTIC BASTARDS

Perfectly in keeping with the general weirdness you have come to expect, on one of the pipe forums there is a discussion about Hallowe'en tobacco. Nearly nine months before it will even be necessary, but someone is already thinking about what they'll hand out to trick or treaters this year. It would not surprise me if it's pumpkin flavoured.

I don't know about you, but I do not wish pumpkin flavoured anything.

Pumpkin flavoured pipe tobacco is an especially vile idea.



Somebody out there is already thinking ahead. "Let's see, we expect a bumper crop of the most useless vegetable in America, what will we do with it?"

"Let's put it in candy, coffee, shampoo, bubble bath oil, candles, body rubs, seasonal teen slut perfume, cakes, car deodorizers, facial scrubs, muffins, bagels, sushi, pot pourri, herbal teas, frozen drinks, frappucinos, and ...
pipe tobacco."

Easter was yesterday. There's a reason the bunny rabbit doesn't hand out pumpkin flavoured crap. We'd kill him if he did. Nothing says 'resurrection' worse than pumpkin.

Because I am a curious man, and a glutton for punishment, I tried "pumpkin spice" pipe tobacco once. It was everything you'd expect.


America has more unmitigated bounders than any other country.



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