MEN LIKE ME

Some of the social media groups to which I belong are coteries of pipe smoking individuals. Not all of the members are men, of course, and I'm thinking in particular of Mary in South Carolina, who has developed interestingly as an aficionado of good briar, some decent tobacco, photographer of great talent, and crazy cat lady.
But most are.

As a general rule, we are not teenagers anymore. Also, many of us have neatly trimmed facial hair, and like a spot of tea. This does not hold for all pipe smokers worldwide, but is more or less the case with the groups in which I am active.

Beer and whiskey in moderation, spectacles, and dog men.

Libraries, museums, research labs.


So far, I have not encountered a single one of the ladies at the pharmacy where I pick up my refills there, but I'm sure it's only a matter of time. Might be a long wait, though, as they are all Chinese (the pharmacy is located in Chinatown), and the number of spry Cantonese females who are fond of briar and tobacco is small. Leastways not a significant demographic.
Sadly, all of them have told me to quit smoking, it's bad for me.


嘜先生，戒煙，吸煙好危害健康吖!
['mak sin-saang, kaai yin, gap-yin hou ngai hoi kin-hong aaaaaah'!]


It is likely that many of my fellow pipe smokers have had that hollered at them by female persons and individuals in lab coats.
Even miss Mary in South Carolina.

We remain calm, phlegmatic (冷靜 'laan jing'; 安寧啲 'ngon-ning di'), and stubborn.

The firm of Sommer in Paris, founded around the middle of the nineteenth century, ceased manufacturing in 1935, though they were still an active enterprise up to the eighties. Not only is this lovely pipe older than me, it is also pre-war. Acquired it second hand years ago, and it's been a sheer joy to smoke since then.

Smoking is not healthy, and also has an adverse impact on society: 吸煙有危害，重有會對社會產生不良嘅影響 ('gap yin yau ngai hoi, jong yau wui deui se wui chaan saang pat leung ge ying heung'). Plus it kills puppies and butterflies, harms lambs and children, lessens your sexual appeal, causes ailments of a degenerate nature, night sweats, and incontinence, makes you drop your food, and if you smoke, all righteous Vegans and Christians will shy away from you as if you have the plague.


In all honesty, some of that doesn't sound too bad. Being shunned by Vegans and Christians seems effing awesome, in fact. And after a good meal, for instance bitter melon omelette over rice with hot sauce and a hot cup of Hong Kong Milk Tea (港式奶茶 ('gong sik naai cha'), a nice bowlful of Red Virginias with three percent Perique and an equivalent measure of Kentucky firecured leaf is sheer heaven. Trust me on that. Bliss.
Oral orgasm. Induces profound reverie.

Which Vegans and Christian would ruin.
Totally.

Adolph Hitler was Vegan and Christian.
As was Charlie Manson.
And Pol Pot.

TOBACCO INDEX


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