Wednesday, July 22, 2009

GUNK ON YOUR FRIES

Further to my previous posting relating to food, and what may or may not be zapped in the employees' microwave, I really must inform you of even worse dietary practices than the ones I critiqued yesterday.

Peanut sauce on French fries. Instead of mayonnaise.

You see, I'm eating lunch right now.
No, I am NOT consuming French fries with muck or gunkum.
It's a toasted sandwich liberally doused with cock-sauce.

[Cock-sauce: the affectionate nickname for SriRacha hotsauce manufactured by Huy Fong Foods Corp.(滙豐食品公司) See here: http://www.amazon.com/Huey-Fong-Sriracha-Chili-Sauce/dp/B000LO40AG AND http://www.huyfong.com/frames/index.htm (wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Huy_Fong_Foods) .
Please note the proud rooster on the label.]



PEANUT SAUCE RABIES

As previously mentioned, I visit newspaper sites during lunch. One of which is the Algemeen Dagblad, that being a pathetic attempt at journalism for the masses published in Dutch. There is an article on their site which details the ravage wreaked by an angry customer of a snackbar, when he got home and discovered that the snackbar had dumped peanut sauce on his fries. He stormed back and destroyed the place. He hates peanut sauce.

[See here: http://www.ad.nl/rotterdam/waterweg/3386061/Woest_door_pindasaus_op_patat.html]


Quote:
"Een 47-jarige Schiedammer ( ) sloeg december vorig jaar een snackbar in de Nieuwe Maasstraat in zijn woonplaats kort en klein, omdat hij ongevraagd pindasaus bij zijn snack had gekregen en bij thuiskomst een bestelde kaassoufflé ontbrak. "

[Translation: 'A forty-seven year old Schiedammer trashed a snackbar in the Nieuwe Maas Street last year, because without requesting it he received peanut sauce with his snack, and the ordered cheese souffle was missing.']


Flowerpots destroyed, plate glass window smashed, front door damaged, chair hurled into display freezer, and cash register thrown to the ground.

Because of peanut sauce.

Boruch Hashem someone finally protested against peanut sauce. On French fries. Instead of what properly belongs on there. Which is mayonnaise. What is this world coming to?

Peanut sauce.

==================================================

AFTERTHOUGHT

Yeah, he kinda lost it. Not quite the actions of a reasonable man.
Neither is putting peanut sauce on French fries, when you really think about it, but that has apparently become quite common over there since I left in 1978 - when all we could imagine dumping on our fries was mayonnaise.
Still, many people in the US put ketchup on fries, and that's just plain sick. Nauseating. Nasty. Vile. Ick.

Dutch peanut sauce is only marginally better (debatable!) than the yucky peanut sauce used in institutional food programmes, which pretends to be Thai-inspired. Denatured Thai. No chilies. No fish paste. No ground coriander or turmeric. No lemon grass or galangal. No browned onion, garlic, or ginger. No lime juice. No kemiri nuts.
Just p-butter, canned chicken stock, and coconut milk. That too is just plain sick. Nauseating. Nasty. Vile. Ick.

At least the Dutch version has some heat. Though it's still treif in all upsights.


And for your information, I was indeed put here on earth to judge other people's food preferences. That's just the way it is.

3 comments:

gastronomically amphibious said...

Sriracha is what belongs on french fries. That's what.

DEATH BY NOODLES said...

What he said.

GRANT!PATEL! said...

I come back form Noew Jersey and what do I see? You're eating muck. With fries upon it.

Sriracha is good stuff. What he and she said.


---Burning Panties

Search This Blog

THEY'RE GROOVY AND SENTIENT!

In many ways I am a severely disapproving sort. I dislike tattoos, piercings, patchouli, raggedy tee-shirts, potsmoking, public misbehaviour...