Monday, July 25, 2016

ONE OF YOUR PEOPLE!

After seeing a big-boobied blonde from the Midwest go all weepy over dead fish on teevee, she exclaimed "one of YOUR people!" The dead fish being the dinner that several people were eating. Apparently the woman was "mostly a vegetarian". Tears, sadness, poor dead fish.

Then blondie went berserk over the tiger prawns. With the heads still on.
Staring at her. With their cold dead eyes.

At this point my apartment looked at me with flabberdeghastion, and exclaimed in an exasperated way: "your people are too damned weird".


I am a Caucasian. She is Cantonese American. Getting emotional about deceased ocean dwellers which are exceptionally good to eat is NOT a Chinese thing (well, may those Mandarin-speaking northerners, who are strange), and seems to be limited entirely to crazy white folks.
What she refers to accusatorily as my people.

Sorry, no. My people are not flaming idiots.
And as far as I know not vegetarians.
Although some are blonde.
No vegans.


"Your people are too weird!"


Personally, I've got nothing against vegetarians. Two or three of my best friends are thus afflicted. But they are mostly normal in almost every other way.

The only VEGAN that I know that I know (a college girl in the East Bay whom I haven't seen in over three years) would probably not go weepy, but she might pick up the large deceased prawn-American, and in a squeaky voice mime it indignantly accusing the rest of us of murder most foul, and demand justice.
Then she'd cunningly turn her fork and a paper napkin into a protest sign, and try to organize a march for crustacean dignity down the centre of the dinner table.
Or have it fling boiled broccoli at us.
She calls fish "sea kittens".

Prawns are probably "sea hamsters"

Please don't eat sea hamsters!
Cuddly them fondly!
Pets!




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