Monday, October 06, 2014

IN WHICH A RODENT'S DIGESTIVE TRACT PLAYS A ROLE

Sometimes you're fairly certain that someone else's discussion is interesting, downright fascinating. Both ears perk, the radar picks up unidentifiable objects, and all sensors go off at once.

I should have been more attentive to the middle-aged ladies at the other table, but I was enchanted by my little eggtart, and the flaky charsiu turnover. They make the BEST charsiu turnovers there, delicious!
And so very much worthy of total concentration.

Yes, one of my favourite places for tea.

It was, in fact, tea-time.

Four thirty.


While enjoying my snacks, I overheard one of them saying "I like him".
At least I think that it was a 'him' that she was talking about, but at that moment I could not be sure. Third person singular in spoken Chinese is non-gender specific. Tā in Mandarin, keui in Cantonese.

[Mandarin third person "tā": masculine 他、feminine 她、genderless 它。 Cantonese third person "keui": masculine 佢、feminine 姖、genderless 渠。Only the characters are different.]

The sentence "ngo hou jung-yi keui" (我好鍾意他) is straightforward, and implies that the speaker really likes the other person. Really, really like-likes. It is as close as a Cantonese speaker can get to admitting a crush. Naturally one assumes that suitable genders are involved.

At least, I would naturally assume that.
That's just the way my mind works.
Being "a man of the world".

At that point I passionately wanted to hear more. Five middle-aged ladies, one of whom 'really likes him'. Lordy that sounds juicy. Is she already married? Or is this an innocent beginning of something nice?
Are her 'sisters' going to be fully supportive?
Have they ever met 'him'?

If I could have put my ears on sticks and poked them over there below the line of sight, I would have. As it was, I imperceptably angled myself for optimum audible benefit with a subtle forward wiggle of my seat.
They still weren't distinct enough at that distance.
Tried my darndest, no luck.

All I managed to fully understand was when one of them asked the woman who works there "do you have a bathroom that can be used?" (妳有廁所可以用?'nei yau chi-so ho-yi yung?').
Oh blast it, I have NO interest in your potty time!
Say something good, real loud, please!
Ladies, stop mumbling.
Be bold!


解乜嘢事?

It was only when they were leaving that I got another nugget. One that I'm fairly certain testified to a cheerful coarseness, vulgarity even.
Responding to a request for explication, the oldest one chirped "explain a rat's fart!

Never heard that before. But I instantly understood it.
A rat's fart: 老鼠屁 ('lou syu pei').
Quite the mental image.


Subsequent research on the internet confirms that this is not an unusual locution.



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2 comments:

Ari said...

I guess if rats have an ass, then they must fart too, no?

The back of the hill said...

Probably depends an diet and intestinal flora and fauna.

Until now, I have never contemplated what goes on inside a rat.

There's probably a scientific paper I need to read.

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