Sunday, May 18, 2014


In addition to all the celebrations that, as a single man, and not really exceptionally social, I am forced to ignore or just pretend don't happen, there's one other holiday I just found out about that I totally missed.

World Penguin Day.

Oh crap!

That sounds like a festive event I dearly would have liked getting invited to, and I am both hurt and resentful that no one called me. I hate being excluded, and I'm sure that there was lots of herring.
You folks just live to torment me.
All that herring!

Selfish cretins! You ate all of it yourselves.
You and your little penguin buddies.

Just look at them. They're wondering "where's the disco ball? How can ANYONE have a party without a disco ball?"

You guys forgot all about the disco ball, didn't you?

I would have brought the disco ball.
You should have invited me.

World Penguin Day happens on the 25th. of April. I was wondering why everyone seemed so happy, but nobody gave me a clue. They probably thought that, being a single man and not very social, I would not attend even if invited, and if I had come I'd end up sitting in the corner with a glass of whiskey glowering at everyone else gaily frolicking.
Maybe so, but you could've told me.
Don't just assume.


NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.

No comments:

Search This Blog


Some drugs to which people become addicted, which may necessitate incontinence pants, also induce a high quotient of gibberance. Especially ...