There! How's that for a killer title? It certainly is a charming conceit. Yet it actually might become reality in San Francisco Chinatown one or two years hence.
Teenage Cantonese American blogger Snooky Wong writes that what she really wants for her graduation is a motorbike.
http://deathbynoodles.blogspot.com/2009/06/motorbike.html
Quote:
"Harleys have nice round parts, and are solidly built"
Okay. I'll take your word for it. I don't know beans about bikes. Nice round parts are a good thing?
Then she writes:
"...the Kawasaki Ninja ZX-12R --[cut]-- has a huge 1,199cc digitally fuel-injected engine for "unparalleled handling and cornering agility" - doesn't that sound exciting? And it looks unapologetically feminine....."
Unapologetically feminine?
Pictures of the Kawasaki Ninja can be found here:
http://www.burbankkawasaki.com/web_220304/web/street_2005/street_2005_main.htm
From reading Snooky's blog, we know that she is "four and half feet tall and barely sixteen, you freak!"
The motorbike she wants looks huge, and is described on Burbank Kawasaki's webpage as having "mind-boggling power", "brute muscle" and "raw acceleration".
Methinks the only entity here that is 'unapologetically feminine' is miss Wong herself. But no matter. If she wants a heavy duty set of wheels, she will probably end up with precisely that.
The world may never recover.
Fellow blogger, blog-reader, and all-round perverse fetishist Grant Patel reacted by writing: "What better advocacy of big musculated bikes than a delicate miss with chrome and leather and brass and enamel! Oh yes, baby baby baby!"
Grant Patel is, as Snooky once put it, a freak.
It would be no surprise if she used her "big musculated" bike to run him down.
Grant Patel also gibbered on about black lace and prawn curry in his various over-the-top comments. The idea of a petite Cantonese girl on a motor bike sparked his imagination.
Which is quite understandable.
Even I am enchanted by the concept.
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THEIR NATURAL HABITAT
There are more dogs in this neighborhood than children. One very rarely sees people walking their children outside when one is, hypothetical...
13 comments:
"Nice round parts." It's all starting to make sense. That would explain why women write rounded cursive and why they have a prediliction toward VW bugs. I just didn't see the rounded parts on the Bladerunner-mobile that Snooky covets, though. Interesting.
Actually, I have to agree with snooky, the Kawasaki ninja zx 12r is very feminine: the center is sleek, and beautiful, while the intimate parts are wide and open.
It's kinda womb-like. A warm and comforting chassis.
I do not giber! I talk reasonably in rationed tones, quite calm and collected. Prawn curry and yoghurt for the little mincks, I say.
---Grant Perfectedly
Oh buggery bollocks and codswallop! I keep forgetting about your wanting to screen our democratic utterances for your own paranoid reasons, you twitchy little Dutchman. A plague!
---Grant Pissabeds
Documentary proof of Ms. Wong's reputed hotness, please!
Please see this post:
http://deathbynoodles.blogspot.com/2008/12/tang-li-kwun-two-songs.html
And scope out the delightful visage on this youtube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5o3pjJ09TU&NR=1
as mentioned in the post. And note that miss Wong states "this is what I look like". Now, admittedly she then steps back, saying "Just kidding", but that is probably mere modesty.
And, on an even more Humbertian note than yours, she answered the question about cup-size by saying "YES!" (see this post: http://deathbynoodles.blogspot.com/2008/12/sex-love-cup-size-and-wolves.html ), and admitted to size four, petite.
I have no doubt that mister Patel reads and re-reads both of Snooky's posts cited above obsessively, touching and fingering his computer screen while heavily breathing, perhaps slowly slurping down a mango lassi, absorbing its yoghurty goodness .......
And, for clickable convenience, this post:
FACE
This youtube video:
Tang Likwun
This post for 'cup-size': YES!
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PS: Grant, stop clicking! Your keyboard will wear out.
And this is as close to documentary proof of miss Wong's hotness as you are likely to get.
Petite, teenage, and with a face like Tang Likwun. Sounds pretty darn good to me.
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Grant, didn't I tell you to stop clicking??!!??
Carpal tunnel to you, my good man.
Well... you mention things in my world, so I guess it's appropriate for me to comment on some of them:
The Kawi ZX-12R is definitely a rip-roaring bike, capable of warp speeds and possessed of great handling. It's succeeded by the ZX-14, proving the truth of the Latin saying: Parvum bonum, plus melius--(if a little is good, more is better). However, this bike is not for Snooky, who is only 4.5 feet tall... the seat height is 31.5 inches and the weight with fuel tops 500 pounds; Snooky would not be able to touch her feet down and possibly would not be able to lift the bike.
Snooky would, nevertheless, make the ideal passenger on a bike like this; the British would call it "sitting pillion" and the Harley folks would call it (fogive me, ladies) "sitting bitch."
The bike is speed-limited to 186 mph, which it can reach in 5th gear (of six... leaving one whole gear to go) but the electronic governor can be disabled and I'm sure it will easily go past 215 mph. Umm... it'll get there really quickly, too... zero to 60 mph in 2.5 seconds and a 9-second quarter-mile (not long ago, those were dragster speeds).
I suspect that Snooky would be more comfortable owning a smaller, lighter, shorter bike, or riding as the passenger on a big bike(one would never even feel a small person like Snooky aboard). Here are words to be guided by: Leather good; fast good; police bad.
Bob
We lust after a hot young chassis!
---Grant Bikerdudedududude
Even though the chassis-holder is clearly attempting to cotton up to your pants.
---Grant Bluelacefrillies
I have to agree with Bob - That big ass Kawi is waaaayyyyy too much bike the wee lass. But I understand her need for speed and the feeling of having all that power in your control (or lack thereof). After all I was 2 seconds old once too as she is now and the feeling of immortality coupled with lighting fast response goes nicely with the endorphin rush you get when you go from zero to one hundred in a blink of an eye.
I'm an old school Harley man and I ride a shovel head and a pan head. Both of which have beautifully rounded parts. In addition, all old school Harley's are very much like woman in form and function. To me they are beautiful to behold. The dual tanks give me the impression of breasts and the gas caps nipples. The chassis curves in a like a female form so for me the impression when I mount her is well you get the idea.
Also old Harley’s require lots of attention. Before I can mount her I have to go thru a ritual of checking all her parts to make sure everything is tight and right. I don’t have electric start and I don’t want it. I get much more satisfaction in kicking her over my self and pride myself in being able to start her on the first try. Then I have to warm her up a bit before I roll her out of the garage.
But oh that feeling you get when she roars down the road, topless, carefree and powerful. Completely without inhibitions and a real head turner. Men stop to look at my antique and try to guess her age. Little boys in cars stare in wonder and I'm sure to give them a wink as if to say that’s right boy this is the last word in cool.
Kevin
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