Wednesday, July 14, 2010

ARE YOU HUNGRY?

Earlier today another blogger made mention of Peysach. Which, of course, it’s nowhere near. Yet it is worth bringing up, because the seder is the quintessential Jewish meal. Yes, I know – some of you are going to mention shabbes, with either boiled chicken (old country) or brisket ('Neva-gyork Gorod') as being much more quintessential – or even gehakte leber / gefilte fish / kasha varnishkes etcetera – but really, the idea of a representative sampling of Jews sitting around and eating together without bellyaching is Peysach and ONLY Peysach.

Oh. Forget I said anything about kvetching. I wasn’t thinking. Sorry.


All those other foods I mentioned are also eaten by Gentiles. Even kasha – and significantly, there is NO mention of kasha anywhere in Torah, proving that it is an amhoretzishe treiferei, repolsiv im gonzen, un' vorem frestu aza shrikkelikke garbage?

Many other people also have signature ‘quintessence’ meals. But few groups have an entire attitude that goes with the eating together. Thanksgiving comes close, and I suppose for many Christmas dinner has an overlay of customs and essential elements that make it ethno-specific. But these have universal characteristics, and in the United States at least overlap several different groups – a temporary shared community.
Ritual, but not really fundamental.

One other group DOES have a strong and distinct shared meal attitude: the Cantonese.

Being able to eat together is the be-all and end-all of civilization. Punkt.



食嘢先!Eat first!

Nothing quite so cheers up and changes outlook for a Cantonese person as the prospect of food in company. It isn’t just hunger. In fact, hunger is unimportant entirely. Forget anything you may have read about a long history of famine and starvation, likewise that intellectualized crap about "have you eaten yet" being the common greeting because of a lack of sufficient food.
If food were mere sustenance, asking 'have you eaten yet' would make no sense. Just like the questions 'how do you do', 'how ya doing', and 'how’s it going' all assume that you actually are doing or experiencing, 'have you eaten yet' takes for granted that there is something positive that can be reported, and that you WILL eat. Food is the point of the query.

There are two characteristics that distinguish the Cantonese in the eyes of other Chinese: they have the most eloquent curses, and they are the most food-centered of all Chinese subcultures.



你食咗飯未呀?Nei sik-tzo fan mei ah?

Have you eaten yet? The answer tells the person who asked the question what the possibilities are. The acme of all socializing options for a Cantonese person is eating in company. Eat together, share food. Talk, boast, extend comfort, sing, nurture, nourish. Tell jokes. Weep, wail, complain about your in-laws and your children. Instruct the next generation while cherishing older people.
Put the shared food in the middle, everyone reach in and take what they need.


The popular choice for white people eating at a Chinese restaurant is the rice-plate, with a single serving of something per person. It's mine, dammit, and I'm not sharing. Mine! All mine! Piss off!
It just isn't very real. Unless you are forced to dine alone.

The idea of several people together all eating exactly the same dish and same quantity is flabbergasting to the Cantonese. Family-style dining epitomizes their approach to communal eating, and they truly cannot understand the regimented apportionment of food so characteristic of WASPs. When all four of you order Sweet and Sour Pork over rice, expect the kitchen staff to stick their heads into the dining room to stare at you. Truly, white people are weird.

"Whaddya mean they aint' sharing? What's the expletive point of even eating together if they're all gonna have the same thing? Nobody is that bloody fond of Kung Pao Beef!!!"

If you can grasp that anarchic individuality is the governing order at a Cantonese meal, then you will understand both the Cantonese temperament, and the Cantonese restaurant.

Among friends at table, everybody suggests and argues over choices from the menu, picks and chooses from the plates in the centre, offers others the choicest bits, eats what they want, and knows about what they are eating.
Food is the social lubricant: the means whereby they got together, and the tool that enabled interaction.

If your brother shows up late for supper, there's a very good reason: he was at the ka-fay diem regaling pals with a tall tale while they all stuffed their faces with pastries and slurped coffee.
Mei-mei came home late from school? Steamed rice sheet noodle with shrimp - and friends!
Ah-Mun suddenly rushed out of the office? The local bakery just took a batch of fresh egg-tarts out of the oven, gotta get some for the gang before they're all gone!

What do many Cantonese do after a long formal meal? Why, they go out together for mid-night snacks, of course!


The idea of telling the tale of yetzias mitzrayim all night long could not possibly appeal to the Cantonese. Amidst the fray of flying chopsticks, they will speak primarily of dining, especially shared dining. Not only this meal, but also other meals - all meals that ever were and all meals yet to be, are represented at this table, and all the generations will remember and relive these meals.
"Here, have this drumstick. Is there more tea? Pass the salt-baked shrimp, and can I refill your rice bowl? Is there any more Tung-po pork?
Mmmmmm, this stirfried choisum is SCRUMPTUOUS!"

If, at the break of dawn, after an all night feast, someone came and said "masters, the time for the morning shema has come", the Cantonese response would be "hey, let's all go have breakfast first". Sik faaaaahn! Totally.

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