YOU REALLY DON'T NEED TO

Just after I returned from a walk, while cleaning my pipe and making some more coffee, someone called saying "yes, I need to speak to the person who handles the PG&E gas bill please". To which the answer, always, is "no you don't". Perhaps I should have offered her some amateur psychological counseling for her unreasonable conversational needs while I was at it.
Because, as you will readily guess, that's one of my skill sets.
I delight in causing random people mental scarring.
That's what telephones were invented for.
My number, my time, my phone.
You volunteered?

That was a damned good smoke, btw.

Really, I am not that social that I need to talk to random dingoes on the telephone. And definitely not about something so private and personal as my relationship with the local energy company that satisfies all my needs. That's between me and them, and whatever they told you was a damned lie, I am NOT an abusive customer. Or partner. As long as the stove works, plus the microwave and the computer, everything is fine.
Please stop calling me.

Five hours ago, during my first perambulation, auntie with the pistachio ice cream hued hat left her building for her morning exercise. Arthritic uncle slowly came up the street, and grunted in greeting. Dour auntie with the pink coat and the secret cigarette habit was not out yet, but donut boy was returning home from getting breakfast. Later I gave two dollars to the non-talkative black guy who has been on the corner since before I moved into this apartment years ago.

So I've been plenty social already today. And I've only been out with a pipe twice. The day is barely halfway done. There will be more people.

Unless you need a pinch of red Virginia and Perique for your pipe, and a cup of coffee or tea later on, I shan't be very friendly. If you want to read the book that you brought afterwards, no problem, there are comfy chairs, but please be aware that the stuffed animals have their own distinct ideas and opinions, and one of them is a carrion-eater and may sniff at you to see if you're "ripe" yet. And don't step on the imaginary little girl hamster.
She's small and easily missed.


Going out for another smoke in a few hours.
After lunch.




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