Tuesday, February 26, 2008

VINDALOO EVERYTHING

As I write this, I'm eating lunch. Curry and rice, fish fritters, seethed zucchini.


The best Chinese food we had in Vancouver was when I ate lunch by myself in Chinatown. Two little pastries and a bowl of fish-slice jook at the Boss Bakery and Restaurant on Main Street near East Pender.
[Jook is rice-porridge (congee). It is easy on the digestion, light, and if properly made, very tasty.]


I've always been a sucker for fish-slice jook (魚片粥). Made velvety and smooth, thick slivers of very fresh fish added to poach in the heat of the porridge, a drizzle of sesame oil and some minced chive or scallion over - there is little in this world to compare. It is a very simple dish.


It is also a hell of a lot better than the food we had together at other Chinese restaurants in Vancouver.

Memo to self: do NOT take recommendations from white people about Chinese food. Just remember what the white folk did to tofu - the Chinese had it for over two thousand years, and everything was fine no problem; whitey had it for less than a generation and invented tofurky. QED.

In case you're wondering, SHE took the recommendations from white people. Sometimes Savage Kitten is far too trusting (which explains why she is with me, but let us not go into detail about that). I would never listen to my fellow honkies when it comes to Chinese food. Based on bitter experience.
I also do not go into Chinatown for eaties with most other Caucasians, because for some reason they can't resist ordering sweet and sour pork. Or cashew chicken. It's some kind of atavistic addiction. They're twisted.

One of these days I'll probably be flabbergasted when some glow-in-the-dark of the same bleachy hue as myself orders the claypot eggplant with haahm-yu (salt-fish 鹹 魚).
[Haahm-yu is even more of a cultural determinant than bitter-melon, because even though bitter melon (fu-gwa, Momocordia charantia 苦瓜) upsets most non-Asians, it isn't anywhere near as universally appealing as something salty-fishy-funky-stinko. Most occidentals shy away from either. ]

I did not see bitter-melon in Vancouver, in case you are wondering. But, surprisingly, I did see fresh rambutan (hairy fruit; Nephelium lappaceum) and long-ngaan (dragon eye, dimocarpus longan 龍眼). To the best of my knowledge fresh hairy fruit is not available here. Nor do I believe I've seen fresh long-ngaan often enough. So consequently I am rather jealous.


SOMEONE ELSE'S TRIP
Having returned from my vacation, one of my coworkers is going on hers. This is the season for jaunting.
Pursuant her departure, I asked her: "how many days after you land will it take for you to dig your chompers into some dansak and pattice? Wafer per eida?"

She answered: "Dhansak the first Sunday I’m there. Wafer per Eeda, not sure. Haven’t had that in a while. My first priority however, is Suterfeni. I’ve instructed my brother and sister-in-law to have some in the car when they come to Bombay airport to pick me up."

Sounds divine. She's leaving at the end of this week. I hope she has a wonderful time.


----------------------------------------------------------------


About the title of this post:
Savage Kitten and myself were remembering the most frightful thing we ate while in England a few years ago. Which, hands down, was spam fritter (a thick slice of spam, battered, deep-fried, served still soaking with oil). It was stomach-churning. Far worse than the mahogany-coloured burrito (filled with chipped beef and baked beans) served at a pub. Which was inedible.

One should always be willing to try something new. It is educational.

Most English people, and many Americans, are familiar with the clichéed sweet-and-sour sauce composed of sugar, vinegar, and red food colouring. We first thought that if the spam fritter were treated with sweet-and-sour sauce, in the manner of horrid Chinese restaurants out in the provinces, sales would go through the roof - Anglos just purely love sweet-and-sour sauce (see atavistic addiction mentioned earlier). But it would be probably be far more profitable to serve it as Vindaloo. Anything and everything can be cooked vindaloo.
Vindaloo is a cultural paradigm.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

A warm welcome back to the Blogmeester!

I'd assumed the blogmeester was Jewish?
Spam Fritters are not kosher.
The blogmeester is/was not Jewish?

The blogmeester is evidently very competent in the kitchen - a gourmet who knows ingredients unknown to most of British people(myself included) as well as being rather fastidious in other matters - so what in G-ds name made him eat a Spam Fritter? The type of establishments which serve spam fritters are pretty grimy to say the least.


Graham

Spiros said...

Ahem...
I'm pretty sure that I glow in dark every bit as much as you do, and yet if forced to pick a favorite cuisine would probably choose Sicilian, in which your clay-pot melanzan con baccala would be very much at home.
Consider yourself flabbergasted-by-proxy.

The back of the hill said...

Graham,

No, not Jewish. Never bothered converting - the same scepsis which drove me out of the embrace of one creed keeps me from jumping wholeheartedly into the arms of any other. But Judaically inclined. And finding much to prefer on the Jewish side of the divide, fairly little on the xtian. There is naught in Islam or Buddhism which has any appeal. And even less in Hinduism.

What made me eat a spam fritter? Curiosity. And foolhardiness.

The back of the hill said...

Spiros,

I was, tongue-in-cheekily, speaking of wasps. You know I am Dutch-American leavened with Scots-Irish and oddments. You, I know, are ek sau persen Italo-American.

To put it in perspective, think about what spaghetti is like in the Mid-West. And shudder at the idea of having much in culinary common with those people.

The Big Little Tommy said...

FYI

A spam fritter is a slice of Spam fried in batter. Commonly eaten with chips and mushy peas, spam fritters are served in Fish and Chip shops in English northern industrial towns. They were first introduced during World War II due to fish being unavailable[1]. So closely is the spam fritter associated with the war that in 1995 a government memo relating to the commemoration of the 50-year anniversary of the war ending recommended "spam-fritter frying to get into the wartime spirit"[2].

In 2006 the makers of Spam, Hormel Foods, announced the return of the spam fritter in pre-packaged form[3].

Spam fritter is a rhyming slang term for the anus[4].

Anonymous said...

dank U wel Blogmeester.

May Maxima shake your hand yet...

I'll not underestimate the value of SPAM in defeating the hun - though a fritter thereof is truly unwise.

For those who are not obliged to obey 613 up and who are male

Take one slice of crispbread
one 1/4" thick slice of spam
place spam on crispbread & spread upper surface with one tablespoon of Mida's mixed pickle

http://mida.co.in/homepage.htm

devour.

Mida's pickle has a pleasant aftertaste reminiscent of paint-stripper.

You will sweat & your throat shall burn...

a glass of neat vodka - ice-cold will put matters to right-

*****

What about Jock Pies? ever tried them....?

Graham
English-Jock-Canuck ancestry
CofE - LDS experienced
married to an ex RC schoolgirl.....
to late to trim the tadger - even though the Jews are right - but they're extremely poor with PR resp. mission statements

thomas's last sentence reminds me of that old WW2 GI & London blackout problem ref. bumming a fag

Search This Blog

SAN FRANCISCO IS TOO DANGEROUS!

A few years ago, my regular care physician and I had an informative talk about kangkong (ipomoea aquatica), sidetracking from my tobacco use...