THE PUBLIC NUISANCES

Becomes of the looming threat of rain it is incredibly gloomy out there. Which is perfect pipesmoking weather. So if you go outside, you will probably stumble over a throng of middle aged fellows with vaguely English accents -- or Dutch, intangible cultural heritage per the UN and all that -- wearing tweeds or thick prickly sweaters, perhaps sturdy workmen's corduroy, grumbling and sipping tea. That's guaranteed. Except for the Sherlock Holmes fanclub and the Tolkien-freaks. The latter will be searching for places to have second breakfast and puff their long churchwardens while acting cute and Hobbit-like. Of which there are none in San Francisco. We have Orcs instead. So within a few years we'll finally be rid of them.

The Hobbit crowd have been largely replaced by the vape crowd anyway. It was all those fruity flavours. The Hobbiters smoked Hello-Kitty aromatics, because they had no taste and didn't actually like tobacco, so they gradually shifted to Raspberry Eagle Essence or Mango Gandalf in electronic devices, and now lurk around the tenth floor boys bathroom surrepticiously exhaling bubble gum smells.

Blissfully unaware that Orcs are puritanical and have keen noses.
Plus flavoured tobacco is banned in California.
It appeals to small people.

JRR Tolkien smoked Capstan and similar flakes, sometimes Erinmore Flake or Gold Block, especially when slumming in Cambridge, and made Hobbits the butt of all of his jokes. He detested them. Deservedly. Felt that they spread disease and were immoral.

Real tobacco, stuff worth smoking, hints delicately of terpeneols, carotenoids, terpenes, and polyphenols. All of which should be present in the cured leaf without needing additions of liquour, vanilla, or cheap soapy essences.

Precisely like real coffee does not require hazelnut, chocolate, or caramel.
And good tea needs no mango hibiscus peach cobbler syrup.
Only Hobbits drink pumpkin spice matcha.


This post turned into a severely disapproving lecture.
Blame the weather we're having.
Sorry.


Damned hippies.



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