It turns out that one of the people whom I know on Facebook thinks my previous essay about 'Burnt Weenie Day' is too negative. Why, there are tonnes of good people in this country sincerely celebrating! And my sneering at them is unjustified and uncalled for. So I apologize. With limitations. No apologies to Alabama, Florida, Louisiana, Mississippi, and Texas. Nor to Arizona. Their politicians are unprincipled opportunistic butt lickers with badly hidden retrograde cavemen (or women) tendencies and merit calumny and insult.
Still on the fence about Georgia, however. Yes, there's Marjorie Taylor Green. Unmitigated and repulsive. But one of my favourite fellow pipesmokers lives there (John O.), which speaks in favour of the place. Let the one stand in for the many.
No hellfire and brimstone yet.
Wouldn't want to visit the place, because it's filled with chick-fil-A, grits, vidalia onion soda, brown recluse spiders, fire ants, ticks, termites, and all the usual mosquito-borne illnesses (chikungunya, dengue fever, malaria, West Nile, zika, and yellow fever), plus, apparently, syphilitic inbred idiots living in the swamps.
But I admire John's commitment.
He is by no means insane.
Also NOT on the shit-list: South Carolina. One of my all-time favourite tobacco companies (Cornell & Diehl) is located there, staffed by literate real human beings, with a head-blender (Jeremy Reeves) whose innovation and attention to fine details has maintained nearly unviversal (meaning my own) well-being and mellowness for years.
Specifically INCLUDED in my bad-tempered snarl of castigation is the area just to the south of California Street, between Hyde and Van Ness, whose wretched denizens set off explosive devices shortly after midnight yesterday, continuing with brief interruptions during which one could, deceptively, sink back into slumber, till nearly four in the morning. Heathens!
I sincerely hope they catch food poisoning today.
Undercooked chicken products.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Warning: May contain traces of soy, wheat, lecithin and tree nuts. That you are here
strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton.
And that you might like cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.
Friday, July 04, 2025
THE BURNING SEASON
Ever so often a fellow pipesmoker will attempt to friend me on Facebook. Which is flattering. Some of them, however, are Trump supporters. Who do not realize that they are detestable people, poor dears, and hell will freeze over before I give them the time of day. Which goes for all the rightwing hosebags I have to associate with during working hours also, and because of them I hope parts of Marin County burn to cinders this summer.
Well shoot, I hope half the damned country goes up.
For pretty much the exact same reason.
No, we're clearly not all in this together. Every time a natural disaster hits one of the red states I think "good, those dumb sonsofbitches deserved it, hope the barn washes away, mosquito-born ailments hit, they end up desperate for clean water, their damned cows die, and Fema delays whatever help they give till the dipwads are all diseased and bankrupt". Because, you see, I am more or less intolerant of Christians and their bigotries.
Again, we're not all in this together.
Bet the British are happy they're rid of us, which they're probably celebrating today.
And the Canadians are probably damned glad there's border between us. Anyhow, I hope everyone enjoys their burnt hotdog and prancing drum majorettes today. Both of those are best washed down with strong tea. Which of course you can't get in most parts of the country, because people chucked the tea leaves into the drink and habitually swill shitty beer there during the day. On holidays they start at breakfast. Which probably explains why people lose their hands on July Fourth and half the country becomes Florida man.
By the way, that bloody stump or bleeding eye-socket from playing with fireworks?
Ivermectin, manuka honey, and apple cider vinegar. That's the ticket.
Just stay out of the emergency room, fellas.
Real people might need it.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Well shoot, I hope half the damned country goes up.
For pretty much the exact same reason.
No, we're clearly not all in this together. Every time a natural disaster hits one of the red states I think "good, those dumb sonsofbitches deserved it, hope the barn washes away, mosquito-born ailments hit, they end up desperate for clean water, their damned cows die, and Fema delays whatever help they give till the dipwads are all diseased and bankrupt". Because, you see, I am more or less intolerant of Christians and their bigotries.
Again, we're not all in this together.
Bet the British are happy they're rid of us, which they're probably celebrating today.
And the Canadians are probably damned glad there's border between us. Anyhow, I hope everyone enjoys their burnt hotdog and prancing drum majorettes today. Both of those are best washed down with strong tea. Which of course you can't get in most parts of the country, because people chucked the tea leaves into the drink and habitually swill shitty beer there during the day. On holidays they start at breakfast. Which probably explains why people lose their hands on July Fourth and half the country becomes Florida man.
By the way, that bloody stump or bleeding eye-socket from playing with fireworks?
Ivermectin, manuka honey, and apple cider vinegar. That's the ticket.
Just stay out of the emergency room, fellas.
Real people might need it.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Thursday, July 03, 2025
NO LOUDNESS PLEASE
While walking down Pacific Avenue after eating roast pork and tofu with gravy over rice (燒肉豆腐飯 'siu yiuk dau fu faan') at the establishment where I went instead of the claypot rice place where I originally intended to have lunch (which apparently is closed on Thursday) -- it was exceedingly good, and I note that they now also do roast goose (燒鵝 'siu ngo'), of which I am exceedingly fond and I'll have that next time, soon -- it was savagely brought home to me how thoroughly I detest the white American bourgeoisie. Because they're loud.
And uncontrolled. Especially when male and teenage.
No modulation at all, immoderate, and badly behaved. Rowdy.
All thirteen of them. Damn' it all, you unbridled savages.
No wonder the little peckerheads support Trump and spread disease.
I'm surprised that U. C. Berkeley isn't all Asian American.
I suppose they have to let in some of the dingoes.
In lieu of sending them to a borstal.
Other than the mob of young white male highschool flunkazoids, and the horrible cold winds, I very much enjoyed my lunch and the half hour with a pipe afterwards. Traffic in the Financial District was sparse, pedestrians were few. You know, I can still taste that siu yiuk. Delicious.
The pipe afterwards was the perfect capstone.
I probably need some coffee now.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
And uncontrolled. Especially when male and teenage.
No modulation at all, immoderate, and badly behaved. Rowdy.
All thirteen of them. Damn' it all, you unbridled savages.
No wonder the little peckerheads support Trump and spread disease.
I'm surprised that U. C. Berkeley isn't all Asian American.
I suppose they have to let in some of the dingoes.
In lieu of sending them to a borstal.
Other than the mob of young white male highschool flunkazoids, and the horrible cold winds, I very much enjoyed my lunch and the half hour with a pipe afterwards. Traffic in the Financial District was sparse, pedestrians were few. You know, I can still taste that siu yiuk. Delicious.
The pipe afterwards was the perfect capstone.
I probably need some coffee now.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
AND YOUR LITTLE DOG TOO
It's body chemistry combined with modern medication: early in the day I feel perky and in top form, whereas by evening, even with a strong cup of tea, I'm rather limp. And I think a large part of that is amlodipine besylate, which despite the limpening effect is probably beneficial. The low temperatures shortly after dawn are not so draggy either.
Another difference is that the first pipes of the day taste better. Quite excellent! Even if the entire neighborhood is out there walking their furry poo-factories over the blasted heath of Nob Hill, no matter. I shall glower at them, puff, and wonder if there is a suitable local coffee shop without oatmilk lattes, that has a sheltered terrace, and staff that's too lazy and apathetic to object if I commandeer a corner for a cup and pipeful.
After all, all the vegan new age hippies with their bourgeois anti-smoking fury are inside, and have entered through the other door too bleary to even notice the old crotchet outside perfuming the air with his smoke.
There's one location which would be absolutely perfect. It's a corner spot near the top of the hill, currently a defunct office of some sort, with appropriate bleakness and no trees for the hounds to sniff and pee against. The north side would catch the morning sun, the western window wall would be perfect shaded shelter. Just put a table, a rattan chair, and a windscherm there, plus ashtrays, and pretend it's in Amsterdam.
Yeah, not flat, no canal, and on a hillside.
Imaginary Amsterdam. Add a small good Indonesian restaurant somewhere nearby, a shop selling antique ceramics, and a second hand bookstore with an extensive selection of foreign language literature and obscure reference books, and the soymilk matchaccino crowd would probably avoid the neighborhood. Which would be an ideal situation!
No more highly individualist tattoos, no more ripped jeans, no more colourful ethnic rags from somewhere south of Buttachengotenanga. No more Karens-in-training, or downtown techno yuppies. No yorkies or chihuahuas!
A man can dream.
Speaking of dreams, just before waking up I was painting a lacy transparent insect wing with irridescent and reflective areas. Species unknown. One of the clean bugs.
A very warm weather image.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Another difference is that the first pipes of the day taste better. Quite excellent! Even if the entire neighborhood is out there walking their furry poo-factories over the blasted heath of Nob Hill, no matter. I shall glower at them, puff, and wonder if there is a suitable local coffee shop without oatmilk lattes, that has a sheltered terrace, and staff that's too lazy and apathetic to object if I commandeer a corner for a cup and pipeful.
After all, all the vegan new age hippies with their bourgeois anti-smoking fury are inside, and have entered through the other door too bleary to even notice the old crotchet outside perfuming the air with his smoke.
There's one location which would be absolutely perfect. It's a corner spot near the top of the hill, currently a defunct office of some sort, with appropriate bleakness and no trees for the hounds to sniff and pee against. The north side would catch the morning sun, the western window wall would be perfect shaded shelter. Just put a table, a rattan chair, and a windscherm there, plus ashtrays, and pretend it's in Amsterdam.
Yeah, not flat, no canal, and on a hillside.
Imaginary Amsterdam. Add a small good Indonesian restaurant somewhere nearby, a shop selling antique ceramics, and a second hand bookstore with an extensive selection of foreign language literature and obscure reference books, and the soymilk matchaccino crowd would probably avoid the neighborhood. Which would be an ideal situation!
No more highly individualist tattoos, no more ripped jeans, no more colourful ethnic rags from somewhere south of Buttachengotenanga. No more Karens-in-training, or downtown techno yuppies. No yorkies or chihuahuas!
A man can dream.
Speaking of dreams, just before waking up I was painting a lacy transparent insect wing with irridescent and reflective areas. Species unknown. One of the clean bugs.
A very warm weather image.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Wednesday, July 02, 2025
FROM WHENCE ESCAPE
Some of them were right bastards. That being people among whom I spent part of my youth. Duch Christians, like American fundamentalists, can be perfectly horrid people, judgemental and sneering. I was reminded of this by cruising into a couple of webpages that dealt with Valkenswaard and its inhabitants. Fortunately most of them were not like that.
I remember Valkenswaard with slightly more fondness than distaste.
But I do not keep close contact with any of the people from that part of my life, and actually know only two of them on Facebook. That's not really their fault, as it's been quite a number of years since I returned to the States, and I never was socially talented.
Sunlit summers, rainy days, deep café verandas, long long evenings.
Fried snacks. Indonesian foods. First taste of herring.
Cigars. The aroma of coffee.
Silver grey sky.
One memory which particularly lingers is of long hours in the public library in Eindhoven, the metropolis ten kilometer northwards. An industrial city with a technical university and a dull bourgeois culture. Plus browsing at De Slegte, a multi-storey second hand bookstore.
Then maybe more Indonesian food, fried snacks, or coffee. The trainstation also recalls fond memories for me. Probably the main reason I still like stations. Some Dutch and English small towns are charming in that regard. Older architecture, between functional, industrial, and civic pride from bygone eras.
Valkenswaard used to have a functioning station, but when we lived there it was already long defunct. That line hadn't run in ages, and within the town itself the tracks had been removed, leaving a broad boulevard cutting through the town to the east of the city centre, past the Willem II cigar factory. Which now no longer exists either.
Every town in the Kempen region is visually dominated by a church. Around which are often the most lively drinking holes in the place, which nowadays are busier than the house of worship. Cultural priorities have shifted quite a bit in the post-war period.
Coffee, fried snacks, and Indonesian food are nearby.
Yeah, I miss those.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
I remember Valkenswaard with slightly more fondness than distaste.
But I do not keep close contact with any of the people from that part of my life, and actually know only two of them on Facebook. That's not really their fault, as it's been quite a number of years since I returned to the States, and I never was socially talented.
Sunlit summers, rainy days, deep café verandas, long long evenings.
Fried snacks. Indonesian foods. First taste of herring.
Cigars. The aroma of coffee.
Silver grey sky.
One memory which particularly lingers is of long hours in the public library in Eindhoven, the metropolis ten kilometer northwards. An industrial city with a technical university and a dull bourgeois culture. Plus browsing at De Slegte, a multi-storey second hand bookstore.
Then maybe more Indonesian food, fried snacks, or coffee. The trainstation also recalls fond memories for me. Probably the main reason I still like stations. Some Dutch and English small towns are charming in that regard. Older architecture, between functional, industrial, and civic pride from bygone eras.
Valkenswaard used to have a functioning station, but when we lived there it was already long defunct. That line hadn't run in ages, and within the town itself the tracks had been removed, leaving a broad boulevard cutting through the town to the east of the city centre, past the Willem II cigar factory. Which now no longer exists either.
Every town in the Kempen region is visually dominated by a church. Around which are often the most lively drinking holes in the place, which nowadays are busier than the house of worship. Cultural priorities have shifted quite a bit in the post-war period.
Coffee, fried snacks, and Indonesian food are nearby.
Yeah, I miss those.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
SMELLS LIKE ZEITGEIST
After dealing with postal employees and bureaucrats recently, my apartment mate realizes that she must be a nicer person. Which is remarkable, because she already is a very nice person. But she feels bad for sometimes acting under the assumption that her co-workers are idiots. Um, we all do that, it's natural, and they are.
We used to be a couple, then we broke up, and we still live together. Separate rooms, of course. It's been several years. Trust me, she is a nice person. I am not. Which she hasn't ever noticed, because as previously mentioned, she is a nice person.
My obvious flaws are far less noticeable if you're her.
What that means is that for a long time now I've enjoyed the security of living with someone whom I can trust, and her stuffed animals, even though I'm often an unpleasant old crouch, with stuffed animals some of whom are clearly insane.
She also has similar habits, despite being such a hugely different person. She likes tea, I like tea. She likes listening to jazz, I am largely unmusical. She appreciates classical music, I'm somewhat a barbarian. She likes Chinese food, I add hotsauce to it. She occasionally eats junkfood, whereas I think it's only edible if I add hotsauce. And both of us love Indian food upon occasion (although I will ask for a few fresh chilipeppers to nibble on between bites).
When she gets salt and pepper chicken wings from a nearby Chinese restaurant she asks them to throw plenty of sliced Jalapeños in when frying them, because she knows I'll put them on my plate as the perfect vegetable accompiniment, good for digestion and my emotional well-being.
One point on which I'm slowly coming around to her point of view is the mystical belief in snow weasels. Creatures that slink and wriggle around outside during cold weather clacking their cutleries waiting for someone to stumble into their path that they can whack and feast upon. They come down from Alaska on well-worn trails and are the main reason why California is scarcely populated. Bones litter the route along the Sierras.
I used to scoff at that. How absurd!
Now I'm not so sure.
It's been the coldest June in San Francisco since the middle ages. They brought the cold with them. Climate change. Small wriggly foreign intelligences manipulating the weather.
It's a very rational explanation for why I sometimes shut down and whimper.
Unlike some of those stupid people wearing shorts or halter tops.
Early this morning, when I stepped with my pipe for a smoke, I froze my tuchus off. It's still lying somewhere on Nob Hill (Taylor Street at Jackson), shivering on the sidwalk, moaning that we should burn some Republicans for warmth, and their silly little lap dogs too!
Two disconsolate pink blobs, cold cold cold!
I must restore my soul with a cup of HK milk tea and something hot and crispy: a fried fish burger and French fries: 香酥魚柳包 · 薯條 ('heung sou yü lau baau, sue tiu').
Heading out early for lunch in Chinatown. With a sweater.
Darn those snow weasels.
I'm enjoying Ellipsis Flake these days. Another fine tobacco product from Greg Pease. The tin poofle states: "Against a backdrop of rich Virginia tobaccos, small leaf Izmir, St. James Perique and a trace of heirloom Burley create a dreamscap of flavors that dance across your palate. Its natural sweetness mingles with notes of citrus, ethereal hints of exotic spices and a delicately nutty character engaging your senses, inviting your imagination to explore what lies beyond." It's good stuff. Mild-medium, very enjoyable. I scarcely notice the Burley.
The Turkish leaf probably tones that down a bit.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
We used to be a couple, then we broke up, and we still live together. Separate rooms, of course. It's been several years. Trust me, she is a nice person. I am not. Which she hasn't ever noticed, because as previously mentioned, she is a nice person.
My obvious flaws are far less noticeable if you're her.
What that means is that for a long time now I've enjoyed the security of living with someone whom I can trust, and her stuffed animals, even though I'm often an unpleasant old crouch, with stuffed animals some of whom are clearly insane.
She also has similar habits, despite being such a hugely different person. She likes tea, I like tea. She likes listening to jazz, I am largely unmusical. She appreciates classical music, I'm somewhat a barbarian. She likes Chinese food, I add hotsauce to it. She occasionally eats junkfood, whereas I think it's only edible if I add hotsauce. And both of us love Indian food upon occasion (although I will ask for a few fresh chilipeppers to nibble on between bites).
When she gets salt and pepper chicken wings from a nearby Chinese restaurant she asks them to throw plenty of sliced Jalapeños in when frying them, because she knows I'll put them on my plate as the perfect vegetable accompiniment, good for digestion and my emotional well-being.
A COLD PLACE
One point on which I'm slowly coming around to her point of view is the mystical belief in snow weasels. Creatures that slink and wriggle around outside during cold weather clacking their cutleries waiting for someone to stumble into their path that they can whack and feast upon. They come down from Alaska on well-worn trails and are the main reason why California is scarcely populated. Bones litter the route along the Sierras.
I used to scoff at that. How absurd!
Now I'm not so sure.
It's been the coldest June in San Francisco since the middle ages. They brought the cold with them. Climate change. Small wriggly foreign intelligences manipulating the weather.
It's a very rational explanation for why I sometimes shut down and whimper.
Unlike some of those stupid people wearing shorts or halter tops.
Early this morning, when I stepped with my pipe for a smoke, I froze my tuchus off. It's still lying somewhere on Nob Hill (Taylor Street at Jackson), shivering on the sidwalk, moaning that we should burn some Republicans for warmth, and their silly little lap dogs too!
Two disconsolate pink blobs, cold cold cold!
I must restore my soul with a cup of HK milk tea and something hot and crispy: a fried fish burger and French fries: 香酥魚柳包 · 薯條 ('heung sou yü lau baau, sue tiu').
Heading out early for lunch in Chinatown. With a sweater.
Darn those snow weasels.
I'm enjoying Ellipsis Flake these days. Another fine tobacco product from Greg Pease. The tin poofle states: "Against a backdrop of rich Virginia tobaccos, small leaf Izmir, St. James Perique and a trace of heirloom Burley create a dreamscap of flavors that dance across your palate. Its natural sweetness mingles with notes of citrus, ethereal hints of exotic spices and a delicately nutty character engaging your senses, inviting your imagination to explore what lies beyond." It's good stuff. Mild-medium, very enjoyable. I scarcely notice the Burley.
The Turkish leaf probably tones that down a bit.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
THE USUAL PERAMBULANCE
There were two gentlemen sleeping rough on Grant Avenue past the small dry goods shop where I sometimes buy State Express 555 after visiting my doctor, and two fellows who look even worse for wear in the ally of the beer place. While I smoked my pipe in the time before the bookseller arrived a disconnected person asked me if the tobacco shop was further up. Well, there's the cigar store back where you just came from -- it used to be fondly known as the DBS (Dirty Book Store) but they changed hands years ago -- but he didn't want to go there, and proceeded southward. Twenty minutes later he passed by again.
Probably still without smokes.
Yeah um. There are almost no late night liquour stores near Chinese neighborhoods. Not enough raving alcoholics. You really want a Caucasian community for that. Sorry, dude.
Wind. Fog. Cold tourists.
A drunken couple.
Not Chinese.
We actually got into the karaoke joint this evening. It was nearly empty. There wasn't anyone singing John Denver or The Eagles (I hate the Eagles, man), and though Tat Yee did assay a Cantonese air, the volume was not painful. This was after something by Abba had come on.
Abba are the Eury equivalent of The Eagles. It got a little more crowded after that (two well-brought up middle-aged Chinese women ordered Shirley Temples), and the bookseller and myself headed out.
While at miss Vivien's, I used one of my pipe cleaners on my cigarette holder, and realized that the main advantage of both a pipe and a cigarette holder is that you can see what you are setting fire to. That's probably why short pipes don't work for me (in addition to looking too hobbit-like).
Currently shoving GLP's Ellipsis into my pipes. It's perfect for foggy evenings. I might actually go out again later to enjoy the effect of streetlights in the mist, but probably not. I expect that may be what I will be smoking after my bladder wakes me at the usual hour.
It will still be dark and foggy then.
Picking up some refills and having lunch in Chinatown tomorrow.
Looking forward to it. Lunch, that is.
By the way: one of the sewers underneath Spofford is plugged up, and the pavement is slick after the third mahjong parlour on the right. So step gingerly.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Probably still without smokes.
Yeah um. There are almost no late night liquour stores near Chinese neighborhoods. Not enough raving alcoholics. You really want a Caucasian community for that. Sorry, dude.
Wind. Fog. Cold tourists.
A drunken couple.
Not Chinese.
We actually got into the karaoke joint this evening. It was nearly empty. There wasn't anyone singing John Denver or The Eagles (I hate the Eagles, man), and though Tat Yee did assay a Cantonese air, the volume was not painful. This was after something by Abba had come on.
Abba are the Eury equivalent of The Eagles. It got a little more crowded after that (two well-brought up middle-aged Chinese women ordered Shirley Temples), and the bookseller and myself headed out.
While at miss Vivien's, I used one of my pipe cleaners on my cigarette holder, and realized that the main advantage of both a pipe and a cigarette holder is that you can see what you are setting fire to. That's probably why short pipes don't work for me (in addition to looking too hobbit-like).
Currently shoving GLP's Ellipsis into my pipes. It's perfect for foggy evenings. I might actually go out again later to enjoy the effect of streetlights in the mist, but probably not. I expect that may be what I will be smoking after my bladder wakes me at the usual hour.
It will still be dark and foggy then.
Picking up some refills and having lunch in Chinatown tomorrow.
Looking forward to it. Lunch, that is.
By the way: one of the sewers underneath Spofford is plugged up, and the pavement is slick after the third mahjong parlour on the right. So step gingerly.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Tuesday, July 01, 2025
RABBIT, RABBIT. JULY 1, 2025.
Rabbit rabbit. It is traditional to start the year and the months with something lucky, and rabbit rabbit is lucky. In Florida they say alligator alligator instead, which accounts for all the goofy things that happen there.
Wise men stay out of Florida. That's where the booga booga lives.
As well as alligators that raid your trash can.
And use your doggie door.
One of the dreams last night was about something banned in libraries in Florida. No, not drag-queen story hour, or anything about evolution or vaccines. But trust me, worth it.
And it wasn't food related. Everything in Florida is either greasy or fried.
Including highway frog mash, served on a Cuban roll.
Crispy and green.
No, I've never been to Florida. Why do you ask? Do I really need to visit a place where the weather is in the nineties, with high humidity and relatives of De Santis, Rubio, and other rightwing Cuban blowhards everywhere?
Besides the narco-trafficantes and inbred Southern sherriffs?
Kind of like Guantanamo with corndogs.
As I understand it, they're still waiting for the twenty fifth and twenty sixth letters of the alphabet to drop. There is great curiosity. They've heard so much about it.
Maybe they'll finally take up reading.
Avoid Florida, at all costs.
Rabbit rabbit.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Wise men stay out of Florida. That's where the booga booga lives.
As well as alligators that raid your trash can.
And use your doggie door.
One of the dreams last night was about something banned in libraries in Florida. No, not drag-queen story hour, or anything about evolution or vaccines. But trust me, worth it.
And it wasn't food related. Everything in Florida is either greasy or fried.
Including highway frog mash, served on a Cuban roll.
Crispy and green.
No, I've never been to Florida. Why do you ask? Do I really need to visit a place where the weather is in the nineties, with high humidity and relatives of De Santis, Rubio, and other rightwing Cuban blowhards everywhere?
Besides the narco-trafficantes and inbred Southern sherriffs?
Kind of like Guantanamo with corndogs.
As I understand it, they're still waiting for the twenty fifth and twenty sixth letters of the alphabet to drop. There is great curiosity. They've heard so much about it.
Maybe they'll finally take up reading.
Avoid Florida, at all costs.
Rabbit rabbit.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Search This Blog
OKAY, BEULAH!
It turns out that one of the people whom I know on Facebook thinks my previous essay about 'Burnt Weenie Day' is too negative. Why, ...
