THINKING INSIDE THE BOX

It struck me recently that when white people are dissatisfied with their genericness they start dressing funny. You know, uniquely colourful garb that expresses their inner spirituality and creative drang oh look at me I'm wearning Guatamalan hippie rags and I've got beads!
I'm one of a kind! Which is both very Marin and very North Beach.

Almost every unstable person you see at the bus stop with artsy free-spirit Gandalf rags is Caucasian, talks too loud, and says disturbingly off-kilter crap let me step discreetly further and further away from Miss Starburst Sunbeam over here, good lord I don't want to hear another lecture about apple cider vinegar and gluten free chakras.

The majority of Asian Americans very rarely do that.
They don't want to be seen as insane.
Or ecccentric and unstable.


Many white Americans are shiny bugs. Not only do they often wear their batty psycho auras on their sleeve, they feel that everyone must share in the wonderful experience and learn to appreciate it. Blissfully unaware of their unlikable qualities, they are absolute Karens of individuality. Nothing else going for them, but everyone has to smell the patchouli.

Which is why I'm quite looking forward to going to my regular Wednesday lunch place for a perfectly mundane and decent meal somewhere that my fellow Caucasians would probably sneer at, which is favoured by aunties and uncles. The service is brisk and to the point. To the best of my knowledge none of the waitstaff are aspiring artists or musicians.

Well, they could be. But they never mention it.

The only uniquely individualistic garb there will be the loud prints that some women from Hong Kong favour, but that's actually normal. I will also be dressed like a normal person, no one will suspect me of spirituality or artistic pretensions, or even know that I am a Dutch American or might have chakras, auras, or past-lives. Which is good, because I don't.

I don't even have meaningful tattoos. Any tattoos.

I am not a vegan, nor gluten-phobic.

You need not notice.



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