TOO MUCH OF IT

When little kiddies have too much sugar in their system (thank you, soft drink manufacturers and junk food industry), they run around pretending to be airplanes or invading armies and lay waste to the waiting room. Teenagers on caffeine and trailerparkers on meth are just as bad, and the absolute acme are fratboys on beer and presidents on Adderal. Sensible people recognize this, and arm themselves suitably with rolled up newspapers or cattleprods.

Bad biscuit, down boy!

Which explains why, mostly, I stay away from donut shops.
All of those human types can be found there.
At three in the morning.

Consequently I have seldom mentioned a popular place around the corner from my dwelling, which has a line in front after bars close. Apparently since the old lady died, they've changed things a bit, and my guess would be more sugar less fruit. My favourite item is no longer available in any case so there's no point anymore.

In that vein, I was also determined to avoid a product that many people have gleefully experimented with, which contains a variety of tobacco known for being up to eight or nine times higher in nicotine than what is commonly available.


HH RUSTICA

Nictoniana rustica was the weed which the native Americans smoked. Small quantities were mixed with other stuff, and the resultant combustible was used ceremonially, much like cocaine in Hollywood. It was too potent to have much of a market in the old world, and if it weren't for John Rolfe smuggling seeds of nicotiana tabacum in from the West Indies, the Virginia colony would have had no cash crop in the early years and the entire colonial landgrab of the North American continent wouldn't have gotten off the ground for several more generations.

On Friday I read a bunch of reviews of Rustica, which ran the gamut from "this is great stuff, it made me sick" through "this is great stuff, I had to puke" all the way to "this is great stuff, my life flashed before my eyes and I had a profound fit of existential despair". And I decided that it wasn't my cup of tea, I would pass. So on Saturday I bought a tin. It's quite nice. Tangy. And unlike previous experiments with high-octane blends, it hasn't turned me into a complete rectum for the rest of the day. It's very enjoyable stuff.


The reviewers: floral, like violets, and leathery, like horse manure


A friend reports that he likes small bowls with a cup of espresso. I would imagine that grappa or cognac would also be suitable. I seldom indulge in espresso, besides which you cannot smoke in Italian cafes in North Beach anymore so that would take some complexity to achieve. I also avoid alcohol because it might interact adversely with my medications (from which you learn that I am probably no longer a teenager or in my twenties), so nix on that too.

Throughout the day I drink pu-erh tea. So the alertness from coffee at dawn is maintained till nightfall. Rustica would be great in early evening. Common sense and other people's excellent recommendations suggest smaller bowls, so loading up the big boys with this will not happen. But I did not experience a nicotine jangle, nor any lightheadedness, and as previously mentioned it did not affect my social behaviour.


There is a fecund earthiness from the interplay of the components (rustica, burley, and Virginia) hot pressed to meld. It has an almost perfumy floral quality. Per Jensen and MacBaren's have produced something profound.


Since I do not buy the local newspapers, it will have to be a cattle prod.

TOBACCO INDEX


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