Wednesday, August 05, 2009

SMELLING OF DEAD ANIMALS, NEEDING VIAGRA

The other night I was at the Occidental Cigar Bar, enjoying a quiet pipe. Until two young ladies walked in. At which point, the female of the species outnumbered the male in that locale, there being three other customers besides myself, of which two were also of the feminine persuasion.
The new arrivals sat near me, and the larger of the two ladies lit up a double corona, then idly scratched her left rump just above the panty line.
The smaller one fired up a panatella (extra long), and wiggled to adjust her position on the bar stool (slipped thong).
The larger one had red wine, the smaller one a glass of white.


I paid them utterly no attention.


Until I heard about anal sex.


As it turns out, the larger of the two......


Within the amount of time it takes to smoke three bowls, I got to hear that she was Armenian, Irish, German, and Swedish. And Portuguese. And Welsh. And Cherokee (see the high cheek bones?). Did not object to err, um, eh - - - - but with friends only! Or at least men she knew. Had dropped acid while in college. Cooked great Armenian food. Preferred threesomes with two men way more than threesomes with two women. Unless the other woman was a real looker. Had never snorted coke with Giuseppe who owned a nearby restaurant, but wished she had. Pot simply makes her horny. Lots of pot makes her very horny. Was considering going to Vegas for a fortnight to make buckets of money. Had a daughter who was half-Moroccan, and a younger child who was French.
Voted Republican in the last three presidential elections, and was a lacto-vegetarian.


The smaller of the two women was not nearly so interesting. Her only peculiarity was that she was Russian. Just Russian. Not a mixture, no hyphens, just Russian. Had voted Republican in 2004 and 2008, but had been too young to vote Republican in 2000.
She thought Johnny Depp was the hottest, horniest looking man she'd ever seen. A stellar stud. But Leonardo Di Caprio was a very close second, and had abso-divine eyebrows. She'd take either. Bareback both ways. Would gladly go along to Vegas to make a lot of money, cover her rent for a few months.
Oh, and she was also a vegetarian.


They both agreed that meat eaters were gross. Utterly icky. Boring, too.


Details forthcame.


I am extremely glad that Savage Kitten is not a cigar smoker, and eats meat.
Doesn't drink either, red or white.

3 comments:

Graham said...

Twenty years ago I made the choice - purchase a washing machine and a spin-dryer.... or hang around in bars

It would seem that I made the wrong choice.

Here I am sitting in my clean boxers wondering why don't I eavesdrop on girls like that?

Hang on in there BM - tell us more....

Spiros said...

Sounds like a bit of a mixed bag.

Spiros said...

Here's a thought: why not take Grant Patel to the Occidental some one of these evenings? I am sure it would further his understanding of Western Culture.

Search This Blog

IN TUNE WITH WILD LIFE

That noise outside while I was drifting awake? Turned out to be the streetsweeping vehicle. Not actually an owl. But it had sounded ike an o...