REDEEMING BORAT - PLUS THOUGHTS ABOUT PLEASURE OBJECTS

In December of last year I filled out an eHarmony questionnaire. No, not to play the field - there's only one pair of panties that I want to get into - but just to see what would turn up.

I filled out the questionnaire on behalf of Borat Sagdaiev. As a favour to the man. More or less. Just haven't told him yet.


[Mentioned in this post: Hairy Sex Beast ]


The answers I gave to the eHarmony questions were more or less guesses, based on how I understand Borat's personality. I had a framed photo of him wearing his electric green stretchable mankini in front of me while going through the questionnaire, to make certain that the many facets of his sparkling personality would be reflected in the answers.

I kinda went ape - some of the answers were ....., well ....., errrm ....., your know.


Now, ten months later, and eHarmony is STILL sending Borat breathless news about women who wish to be hitched to a man obsessed with anooses, chrams, Gypsies, and Jews (though not the anooses or chrams of Gypsies or Jews).
Plus offers he really should not refuse.

Dear Borat,
Fall is just around the corner, and it's a new season full of great possibilities. To help get your fall off to an exciting start, we are offering you this special opportunity to save.
Get our best deal ever and save an extra 75% on our 3-month plan. That's just $9.95 a month!
Borat, give yourself the opportunity to fall in love this season and join eHarmony today.
Offer Ends Soon!



Their faith in Borat's innate lovability is touching. On behalf of the man himself, I shall be touched. I never though of Borat as a pleasure object, but someone does.


NOTE: The term 'Pleasure Object' is also a high-fallutin' term for vibrators and dildoes.
I found this out yesterday while at an emporium near my house - I was discretely listening to half a dozen young Philippinas talking in front of the display of 'Pleasure Objects'.

Snippets of overheard conversation:
"How many batteries per week? Oh, about six, sometimes eight or ten." "This one plugs into your computer - must be for business people." "The g-spot is the female equivalent of the prostate - hah, they haven't felt either!" "This one comes in two sizes - the extra-large one must be for blondes." "You can hide that one in a bowl of bananas." "Which end is the wrong end?" "Sounds like a dentist's drill." "No, not the pink one - too teenagy; purple and black are more assertive". "Lifetime warranty? What the hell do they think I'll be doing in sixty years?" "Size like a dump truck." "It's not how it feels in your hand that counts."


Between the six of them, they spent over a thousand dollars. Mostly on the stealth models - the ones that don't sound like a band-saw.
Ergonomic, plus European design.

They've got their priorities screwed on right.
More power to 'em.
Borat is NOT part of their welltanshauung.