WE ARE NOT AT WAR!

You don't need to ask permission if it's not a war, so, as per our inspired leadership, we are officially not at war. Maybe Iran is, we don't know, but we aren't. It's time for a peace prize, as I think you will all agree. Congress certainly does. And by the end of his third term, we will have forgotten all about it. Which congress will also agree to do.

And, given the calibre and morals of his supporters, it is best to agree.
Because you do NOT want several million trailerparkers angry.
It might affect the quality of methamphetamine.
Which is proudly made right here.
It's all-American!


Like war.


By the way: He aced three cognitive tests. Absolutely blew everybody else taking it out of the water. And recognized the giraffe that bit him amost immediately. Yes, it was in the room with him. It was huge. Dangerous animals, giraffes. Lock them up. Everybody always says "lock up the giraffes, mr. President". USA! USA!

Congress agrees. They always do.

Several months ago I also aced a cognitive test -- banana chair sunrise -- but I seldom boast about it. Because entirely unlike our president I still have all my marbles -- banana chair sunrise -- and can take such things for granted.

In about five weeks there's another doctor's appointment.
I wonder what three words they'll have then.
Not banana chair sunrise.

Will giraffe be one of them? Apparently there are giraffes around every corner, waiting to bite the president. We've got to do something! Can't have wildlife trying to eat him, he's almost a god, second hand of Jesus, a divine being all aglow, it's just not done!


Bad giraffe, no president for you!

Go bite a trailerparker instead. We have tonnes of those. There's darn well millions of trailerparkers, they're a dime a dozen, but only one president.



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