WAVING LITTLE FLAGS

Cheeto-Boy is in Beijing, and the Chinese don't know what to do. Re-educate him? Deep-fry him? Whip him to death with limp noodles? This is the question. For the time being they've chosen to wave little flags at him as he bears tribute, like so many dumb barabarians before him. Meanwhile, his rabid pet monkey Vance is trying tobankrupt California by withholding Medicaid funds.


What's sad is that his tiny little hands and wee pudgy fingers are still rotting. Which will soon severely limit his late-night twittering fits. Sad. Probably all that junkfood. The man lives off of it. Sad. It's the only thing that connects him to his base and gives him a taste of how the average blobbo red state voter lives. He and they feast on the same garbage.

They share many other tastes.


Most paradigmatically, big breasteses. Kind of like Oswald Bates.
Or was it the famous jazz guitarist Calhoun Tubbs?

In any case, it's what all the Trump women have in common.

Gotta respect the big breasteses. Big breasteses and hamberders stand in for economic policy, foreign affairs expertise, and political leadership, with the wholehearted drooling approval of every Republican official.

Those are both fundaments and pillars of rightwing patriotism. Why, our great nation would just not be the same without them. All over the world people look to us as a beacon of big breasteses and hamberders.

Deep in the war-torn Guatemalan rainforest, little orphans (Pablo or Pedro) dream of big breasteses and hamberders, and decide to trudge north until they find them.
Big breasteses, 'mberders, or bust!



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