Correct.
The reality is worse.
I'm actually a hairy ill-kempt savage.
You would not want to meet me. I might offer candy and make unclean suggestions. Come here, miss, you should really try this Commander's Rope Tobacco. It tastes deliciously like old sweatsock (that's Perique, from Louisiana, it adds a je ne sais quois). As well as this mead which has passed its prime. Great with a hákarl sandwich!
Hákarl is feremented shark from Iceland. It is a delicacy. Precisely what all sweet young things need to experience. Life is hard and miserable. Then you encounter hákarl.
Suddenly you have perspective! Life is sunny, and better than you thought!
I lurk in doorways offering strangers hákarl.
It's why you come to San Francisco.
Self portrait based on one of Jan Prokopic's characters.
Jan Prokopic has nothing to do with hákarl.
He animates with a computer.
I am strangely obsessed with fermented fish products. It reflects my Dutch heritage. Among our other peculiar comestibles, besides things which are not quite Icelandic fermented shark but confusingly similar, is salty strong licorice ("zoute drop"), and something called salmiak.
Licorice assertively flavoured with ammonium chloride. Which I like, but you would probably hate. Ammonium chloride is found in guano deposits, among other places.
The guano deposits act of 1856 allows the United States Government to take possession of unclaimed islands with rich guano deposits. Possibly so that the damned Yankees can commercially hold us Dutchmen over a barrel.
Guano is bat pooh.
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