TEXAS, LEARN TOFU!

Seeing as China will not buy our overpriced and mediocre soybeans, dispiritedly grown by Trump voters, and is purchasing good quality soybeans proudly grown by Argentinians and Brazilians instead, there is only ONE solution to the soybean glut. Two solutions. Either we feed it to the hogs in the Midwest, which ought to satisfy the Trump voters there.
OR places like Texas learn how to cook tofu.

Which should be no problem, because they have no cuisine anyway.

And this blogger for one encourages that. Tofu is great with minced pork, chorizo, or even Texas chili (which is made better in Portland, Oregon, or Chicago, Illinois, anyhow). Or they could even do it typical Anglo-style. Plain-boiled. With a chopped Jalapeño for colour.
It would fortify the Texas guardsmen while they round up and brutalize people.

In places where no one wants to sell them dinner.

Some of them might loose some weight.

Look leaner and healthier.

Human!

At present too many Texas guardsmen look like Blobbos who've been sitting on their duffs playing videogames and snarfing Fritos. And while I personally have nothing against Fritos, they should not by any means be the default starch in anyone's diet, not even Texans.
Boys, y'all look like you're related to Kyle Rittenhouse. It's disgraceful!

Yeah, I know they're a valuable part of your school lunch programmes down in Houston and Dallas, as well as part of your Texas National Guard MRE rations, but honestly.
There's more to a healthy diet than crunchy-munchies and bacon.


Maybe you should ask your obedient Christian wives and moms to learn how to cook? Healthy eating is, maybe, why everyone keeps stealing your jobs.
Especially emigrants from the civilized states.
Who are fit, not fat.


Tofu is good stuff. Made from America's crop, soybeans! Grown by hosers in the centre of the country. Go on, help out those suckers by learning how to cook.
Don't let Argentina and Brazil have all the fun.

Grits and tofu. An all-American meal.
Such feast, yummity yum!



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