At the back of the hill

Warning: If you stay here long enough you will gain weight! Grazing here strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton. And you might like cheese-doodles.
BTW: I'm presently searching for another person who likes cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.

Thursday, January 31, 2008

THE ARAB NIGHTMARE

[In which our blogger plays devil's advocate, and seems to argue passionately for Palestinian self-determination and a "two state solution".
I have nothing against Arabs - why, some of my best friends are Arab!
Hi Mohsen, hi Fayed, howdy Monzer and Latif. Keyf-ak hal y'all?]




YESHA
Yesha, more or less, is a territory consisting of five million angry Arabs.... and a number of "other" people.


Yesha is an absurdity - a small minority of Yidden surrounded by a huge number of anti-Semites sounds more like eastern Europe than a territory that could actually survive longer than a few weeks. But Yesha is the strategic depth of Israel. Without control over the territories, Israel is threatened with annihilation.

The Arabs have, for over a century, proven themselves unreliable at peace and untrustworthy at diplomacy - they can not be partners nor safe allies. Their only saving graces appear to be their incompetence and pettiness.
Yesha is the part of Israel that has the most Arabs.

As it currently stands, Yesha is a liability - continuation of what the world persists in calling an occupation undermines the moral validity of the Jewish state, and nourishes a virulent anti-Semitism among certain elements in Europe and America. The current situation damages Israel. What can be done?



POSSIBLE SOLUTION
End the occupation and withdraw. But leave a buffer zone.

Given the tendencies of the Arab residents, one solution for Yesha appears to be withdrawing for strategic and demographic purposes (shrink-wrap around the Judaic element), and enforcing an unpopulated (Arab-free) buffer zone beyond the border as wide as the range of a Qassam or Katyusha. The world would never accept this, though, and while the opinions of the rest of the world should not be taken into consideration, I doubt that the Jewish state has the will to go ahead and do this. In the foreseeable future. Yet.

That leaves what?



ALTERNATIVE NO. 1.: Dig in among the Arabs.
Which means leaving several million Arabs in Israel.


Not precisely a comforting prospect, that.

Keeping people who want to destroy you and murder you INSIDE the land, and therefore being obligated to extend citizenship to them, is somewhat suicidal to say the least. Arabs are not known for sweetness and light. Yesha, in parts, is a bog filled with Arab quicksand.

A Jewish national state splattered with no-go areas is not exactly the lean, mean, and survival-guaranteed Israel which we desire, but more like a bloated over-eater waiting for a fatal heart-attack. It is better to have an area where the Arabs are a hindrance to their own violent cliques than a fifth column for the IDF.
Which brings us to the second alternative.



ALTERNATIVE NO. 2.: Arrange limited population transfers of both groups, with clear demarcation and every Palestinian within range of Israeli guns.

The ideal Israel should contain far fewer Arabs, have a strong and firm border, and hold strategic vantage points. There is no reason to make the Arab territories contiguous or viable, however. Once Israel has divested itself of the Palestinians they are on their own.

The Arab version of self-rule, with certain tendencies encouraged, might even not be too problematic. More than autonomy, perhaps less than independence.

Arab governance, while a bad dream for the world, has proven a nightmare for the Arabs. And Arab societies consistently would rather commit slaughter among their own people than risk instability by supporting the Palestinians. This holds especially for the Arab nations that actually have Palestinian populations; they would much prefer to be rid of them, and wish that migration go in one direction only. Both Egypt and Jordan would be better off without a single Palestinian in their midst.

While it is both right and proper that Palestinians should be a liability for the Arabs, it is incomprehensible that Israel should volunteer to remain so burdened.

If the Palestinians cannot shoot Jews, they will shoot each other - there is no Arab regime that does not brutalize its own population. There is no such thing as Arab democracy. There is no Arab law and order, there are no Arab civil rights, there is no Arab justice. Respect for the individual scarce exists in the Arab world, a free press will likely never exist, and education exists primarily as a step-ladder out of the Arab world - either into the West, or into the ranks of the corrupt ruling class. Were it not for oil, there would be no Arab world today - their own tendencies would have caused the Arabs to destroy themselves.



Once Israel has divested itself of the Palestinians (meaning, once "Palestine" is no longer a "Jew" issue), it is only a matter of time before the Europeans grow weary of them and cease dumping money into Swiss bank accounts. The other Arabs have already shown that they feel little need to support their brethren.
Once Israel no longer has Palestinians, Palestinians will cease to exist.

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UPDATED BLOGROLL

The blog roll has been updated. It was time to do so.


FREQUENTLY READ BLOGS
Those blogs which I read anywhere from daily basis to once in a blue moon have, of course, been kept (the dailies, in the order in which I read them: Dovbear, Steg, Jameel, Search for Emes, Treppenwits, Midianite Manna).

A few blogs have been added - not all of them are j-blogs, but trust me, they're all kosher - heck, they don't come any koshererderererererer).
[I particularly recommend that if your name is Graham, Spiros, or Steg, you start visiting Shapeless and Cofusing Monstrosity (http://shapelessandconfusingmonstrosity.blogspot.com/).]

Some blogs have been removed. I no longer read them, and in one or two cases the links had become pointless due to inaccessibility or the author's hibernation or stugheid.


MANGA
One link has been added that is by no means a blog - onemanga, for the best in modern Japanese literature. If you are a teenage bocher, or uptight about tz'nua, you might want to avoid it....... OR, on the other hand, plunge right into that site (depending on your level of internal conflict and hormonal angst, I guess).

I can recommend some fine ecchi stuff, but after a while you'll probably discover that the best reading is manga with a teenage female protagonista, perhaps some mild fanservice (panty shots, non-photo realistic breasts, thighs), a high-school as part of the story environment, and a lot of character development and humour. A strong story-line and a boffo set-up are also very important. Romantic manga can be fun, often not so much in the standard boy-girl (or girl-girl) developing-love sense as the boy-girl (or girl-girl) seething-dislike category. Any manga in which the sentence "aack, you pervert!" occurs is worth investigating.

Please note that in much girl-meets-girl manga there will be less fanservice (if any), gentler humour, more character development, plus more sweetness, than in stuff aimed at teenage boys and salary-men. Consequently it is far more rewarding to read.
If it occurs, the occasional groped gland is icing on the cake (and may actually be accidental).
[Seasoned lesbians may find the heroine's vulnerability irritating, but it is quite Japanese - hard edges discourage the reader's feeling for the character and make for an unsympathetic story. For more on the girl-meets-girl category, please see the link to the Yuri Blog.]


NEWS SITES
Just for the heck of it, I've also included a list of news-sites. These should not be seen as 'blogger-approved news dispensers' so much as mutually balancing sources, perusal of which will give a broad-spectrum view and a surfeit of stomach acid.

Some of the news-sites are in Dutch: Algemeen Dagblad, Gazet van Antwerpen, NRC Handelsblad, Parool, Trouw, Volkskrant.
The first one mentioned, if you read Dutch and are capable of civilized thought, is guaranteed to eventually give you headaches and heartburn.
If, on the other hand, you are a normal Dutchman, what are you doing reading this?


MUTTAWA
The link to the Muttawa blogspot has been left on the blog roll. Yes, he hasn't written anything since June of 2006, but he is still the model for bloggers from his part of the world, his writing has humour, eloquence, and point, and he is very much worth rereading.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

DETONATE MOPPETS

No post today.

Between the pictures of hot hot hot! shiksas wearing sheitels on Dovbear's blog, waffles (Jameel) and wall-sparks (Treppenwitz), dangerous pictures of animals (thanks, Tzipporah, I'm getting nothing done today), AND the battling bugs courtesy of search for emes, the J-blogs are providing all the mental nourishment you need.

Go learn from the masters, IY"H by you, it's a blessing, thank heavens far from us. As long as you're happy, that's all that counts, lehavdil.

Oh, and the latest edition of haveil havalim (http://wwwjackbenimble.blogspot.com/2008/01/haveil-havalim-151-psd-edition.html) is out.

Some good stuff there. Give it your attention.

The headline of this non-post comes from one of the links in edition 151.

Monday, January 28, 2008

WET AND ANGRY FRIDAY

It rained the entire day. Cats. Dogs. Anti-Semites.


Friday was one of the most unpleasant days I've had. It left me exhilarated and inspired, yet filled with hatred for my fellow man, and murderously inclined. As well as soaked to the skin.

Parts of me that do not need mentioning had been exposed to water for so long that they looked like prunes and felt like wadded-up snotty tissue.

Sog. Drench. Splash. Puddle. Spongy.
Whatever. Many words having to do with wetness.


Our side (Zionist and pro-Israel) was out in the rain for six hours.


From twelve to one outside the consulate was taken up confronting the remarkably ignorant members of Jewish Voice for Peace, with their simplistic "Zionist evil-bad, helpless Palestinian teddybears good-weepy" message. They're idiots. We know that. May they choke.

After they left there was a forty five minute respite till the Berkeley contingent of Women In Black showed up. They too are remarkably ignorant. More sentimentalist crap in the tradition of "happy huggies good, evil Zionists bad". They stayed until just before four o'clock, clearing out like cowards before the Jihadis and Int'lAnswer showed up.
I guess they draw the line at being too close to angry Muslim teenagers, even if the angry Muslim teenagers share the same remarkable ignorance.
[JVP and Women In Black are the enablers and apologists for the anti-Semites, but probably too genteel to be seen with the morons who do the dirty work. Remarkable ignorance may be empowering, but it is not cozy. ]


Evenso, a small handful of JVP and WIB was so convinced of their rightness that they did stay, to stand with the Jihadis and aged communists, though uncomfortably off to the side.

At four o'clock the crowd outside the consulate had swelled to over a hundred and fifty - two hundred. About three-quarters of whom were Muslim (mostly young Arab), the remainder fellow-travelers who happily and inanely smiled as the Muslim jugend chanted.


What did they chant?

"Palestine is our land, all the Jews are our dogs" (Falastin bladna, kol Yahud qalabna).
"With our souls and our blood we will redeem you oh Palestine" (ba ruah, ba dam, something something Gibber-stein).
"Palestine will be free from the river to the sea" (this was in English - it means that Israel will be erased).
"Takbeer! Allahu Akbar! Takbeer! Allahu Akbar!" (This roughly means "I'm an idiot, I left my beer at home").
Etcetera.


The poor dears worked themselves up into a frenzy. Some of them would've ignited if it had not been raining so hard. But still, they steamed. Righteously.

Rhetorical question: What do one-hundred and fifty wet anti-Semites smell like?
[Unwashed hippies having group-sex? Cow-pie? Wet dog? Skunks? Berkeley?]

There were several speeches blaming Jews, Zionists, and the IDF for any number of crimes. There was the assertion that Jews and Capitalists control American foreign policy. There were accusations of genocide, war crimes, exploitation, slavery, and poison gas, plus the flooding of the streets of Gaza with sewage. There was also a ritualistic Arabic praise-chant for the holy martyrs of Hamas.
There was no mention of rockets (unless that was the "legitimate resistance" that one ideologue driveled on about), nor any mention of snipers, bombers, stabbers, kidnappers, or lying Arab politicians (probably those also fall under the rubric of "legitimate resistance").
[Strikes me that this is like a rapist asserting that his victim clearly asked for it, because she was in his neighborhood and female.]


The speechifyers whipped the crowd into a frenzy. Having half-a-dozen Zionists across the street offended them. It ignited their passion, and gave them a focus for their anger. It distracted them entirely from winning hearts and influencing people. Anybody passing by would not have been won over to their side - and dozens of pedestrians stepped off the sidewalk rather than walking through what was clearly an unstable and potentially violent mob.
Even the simple-minded JVPer who I had spoken with earlier was starting to look disconcerted. The violent rhetoric was not at all like her warm fuzzy butterflies fantasy about the Palestinians.


I smiled patiently for most of the two hours of being yelled at, except for when I had to klop a communist repeatedly with an Israeli flag in an effort to get him back to his side - by the forth klop he insisted loudly that this was a free country and he could stand wherever he wanted, by the fifth klop I reminded him that only minutes ago he had said otherwise, by the sixth klop I told him that, as an angry proletarian, I could not be held responsible for any ill-effects to his skull now get lost you despicable chowderhead. The police escorted him back across the street. He glared at me for the remainder of the time, with a hurt and confused expression on his face, as if baffled by this Zionist triumph. How did that evil Zionist win, when clearly there were so many more anti-Zionists? He didn't resume the happy hateful chanting, preoccupied as he was with the injustice of it all.
His companions, however, more than made up for his silence.

One hundred and fifty screaming fanatics yelling at six Zionists. Six cold, wet, arthritic Zionists. Yeah, that's really gonna win support for the Palestinian cause.


If you ask me, we won - there were more than twenty times the number of soaked-to-the-bone pro-Pallies than wet Zionists. That can't have been healthy for the pro-Pals.

Heh.

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Friday, January 25, 2008

PIGS ARE OFFICIALLY NON-EXISTENT

Welcome to 1984. Now please erase all reference to pigs from your library.
They no longer exist.
At least not in civilized public discourse.
There will be burnings.


The BBC article linked below highlights politically correct taken to an absurd degree.


In short: The Brits have shitcanned the three little pigs (children's story, nota bene), because mention of pigs might, conceivably, be offensive to Muslims - and mention of buildings that collapse might offend builders.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/education/7204635.stm

I do not recall any builders objecting to the tale before.
And there does not seem to in any way be a jihad against the story of the three little pigs among Muslims - there have been no porcine anecdote riots, no screaming throngs breaking windows anytime a pork-commercial has shown on teevee, no burning of cookbooks - the Muslims just ain't offended by the story existing.


Why did the idea of porky references all of a sudden become an issue?
The Jews haven't demanded that the story be obliterated. It may not be a story told or read much in Jewish schools....... And it probably is not a favourite bedtime story in the frum community either. But I do not recall any yiddishe riotim over hog tales.

Even in Mea Shearim, there have been no pork-inspired bleach-splatterings or garbage can fires.

It ain't an issue.

Muslims haven't made it an issue.


But some moronic bureaucrat (probably with eco-terrorist sympathies) thinks it is.

Okay then. Let me assert that the tale of Chicken Little is hideously offense to adherents of Santeria and the entire municipality of Petaluma. As a chicken-respecting individual, I demand that Chicken Little be destroyed.

Obliterated.

Burned.

Preferably with barbecue sauce.
Zesty barbecue sauce.
Jes' don't invite any bureaucrats to the feast - those poopheads don't appreciate the finer things in life anyway.

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Thursday, January 24, 2008

KIND REGARDS

Dear readers,

As some of you know, I belong to one or two mailing lists. Often I find myself expressing myself somewhat pungently in retort to fellow members.

How can I possibly spare you the agony.... Errp, I mean, keep these gems from you?

So I won't. A sampling is below.
Enjoy.

=============================
I

" ... the usual Dutch-writing dimwits have already decided that somehow this benefits the United States, and therefore Prez Bush must have "done it" - the preferred conclusion was, pavlovianly, jumped to.

Shee, don't y'all EVER get tired of blaming the US?

Rabid conspiracy theories with the United States as the crux of all evil seem to be second nature over there in the Netherlandish bog - does that humidity affect brains? Or is the past-history of the Netherlands, with its own long list of dirty tricks, imperialist excesses, and depraved behaviour, suggesting to some mal-educated people over there that foul-play is the ONLY POSSIBLE explanation for EVERYTHING that happens in the world?

I know some Dutch are decent, fine people. Civilized, rational, and gifted with the ability to think both straight and with great subtlety. Literate, and even eloquent and admirable.

But damn I'm tired of the remainder.
Fercrapssakes, take a pill, y'all.
=============================
II
Starting to retch at the sight of Dutch. Not that it is an unlovely language, no, far from it - but the current users leave overmuch to be desired. I fear that this is because of a structural problem in the language itself. Human thinking may not be easy in Dutch.
=============================
III

Datgene over kranten leidt natuurlijk tot de enig mogelijke konklusie dat Nederlandsche dagbladen, en vanzelfsprekend ook hun lezers, nogal de pe hebben aan Jenks. Daar in een dagelijkse oppervlakkig nieuws journaal zowiezo geen of weinig nuancerings vermogen zal blijken te zijn zit het er even dik in dat de doorsnee lezer niet nuanceert en geen onderscheid maakt, totdat het moet. En Nederlanders zijn stug, dus 't is al een verloren zaak. Hetgeen ik in mijn omgang met Nederlanders immer heb kunnen merken. Die dijk is al gebroken, een vingertje in de gat duwen helpt nauwelijks meer.
=============================
IV
Is something wrong with the educational system over there?
Reason I ask is because I just read the following: "Onder de huidige omstandigheden moet je gewoon niet naar de VS. Een mooi land maar dat er amerikanen wonen - het tuig van de planeet - is erg jammer. En ze vergelijken met de Nazi's is wel degelijk gerechtvaardigd, alleen is de onderliggende filosofie een andere. Overigens hadden we zonder de VS niet duits maar russisch gesproken en inmiddels dus weer vrij zijn. Van de VS komen we nooit meer af."

[Under current circumstances you should just not go the US. Beautiful country, but that it's filled with Americans - the dregs of the planet - is a frightful shame. And comparing them to Nazis is certainly justified, only the underlying philosophy is different. Besides, without the US we wouldn't have had to speak German but Russian and would by now have been free again. We're never going to be rid of the US.]

You lot surely understand that the fellow who wrote that has 'issues'. But he does represent the majority of people in that Dutch-speaking country.
=============================
V
De VN is zo verrot als de pest, het merendeel der landen daarin rinky tink tyrannien en derde wereld gangster regimes, en de Europeanen zijn over het algemeen sedert de tweede wereld oorlog onbetrouwbare Moscow sympathisanten geweest.
Gezien het hoog gehalte van "alle Amerikanuh benne schoftuh" in de uitspraken van politici en burgerij van de rest van de wereld zou ik zo zeggen: stik maar. En daarmede bedoel ik natuurlijk de Arabieren, de Zuid-Amerikanen, de Afrikanen, de Aziaten, en vooral de Europeanen.
In feite zou de VS absoluut geen fondsen meer moeten geven aan ramphulp, armoede bestrijding, en ontwikkelingshulp. Het is slecht besteed, en kweekt alleen maar terroristen en saboteurs.
=============================
VI
The anti-war movement here has been hijacked by all the extremists who used to belong to the communist splinter groups, just like the Socialistische Partij in the Netherlands represents the hardcore Stalinists of the kenML and various other supporters of murderous "revolutionary" streams.

It's a pity, though. Other than appealing to idiots who will join anything that seems deliciously anti-establishment and ultra-progressive, the anti-war movement no longer represents regular Americans, but instead propagandizes for all the most hateful causes. Besides being sodden with dysfunctionals, conspiracy-theorists, Europeans, and informers.

Strange that 'socialism' attracts such antisocial elements. Unfortunate, too.

I have become a lot more comfortable speaking my mind because of it. And a lot more "sociaal bewogen". But also a lot more cynical and realistic, and far less likely to visit Europe ever again. Unlike the citizens of the Soviet Union, who had no choice, today's Europeans have willingly and knowingly gone over to the dark side.
=============================
VII
Heb de afgelopen paar daagjes zorgvulding de Nederlandsche kranten gelezen, alzook de reacties onder artiekelen, en kommentaar op de gebruikelijke Nederlandstalige webfora.

Het schijnt dat het overgrote deel der Nederlanders fanatiek pro-Ahmedinejad is, al is het alleen maar omdat hij Bush maagzuur bezorgd.

Tevens kan het de Nederlanders geen wak schelen dat men in Birma protesteert, in Somalia crepeert, of in de Soedaan afgeslacht word.

Kan slechts konkluderen dat Nederlanders een kleinzielig oogverklepte stel hypokrieten en vuillakken zijn. Over het algemeen. Merendeels. Er zijn uitzonderingen, natuurlijk.

De Vlamingen zijn echt niet beter - louter Ollanders verschift. Veel van hun blijken, zonder zelfs maar een greintje van VS wet en rechtspraak af te weten, een potentieele kinder verkrachter moreel te steunen. Omdat hij mede Vlaming is, en het slachtoffertje een Amerikaans meisje is. Die, volgens de Belgen, wel een verleiderlijke troela moet zijn.
=============================
VIII
The Syrian taxi-driver this morning said that the only people who showed up were the Jooooos, and the collaborationist Persians who fled to the US in the eighties (he heard it on Al Jazeera).

For those of you in the Netherlands, especially if you stemmed SP or PvdA, better not ever visit the US; far too many Jews for you guys to feel comfortable. Besides, you folks disapprove so horribly of everything American that you would probably vote for Ahmedinejad, and sell your own daughters into whoredom to fund his campaign.
=============================
IX
Enkelen van ului hebben mij wel eens verzekered dat de reacties onder artiekelen in het Algemeen Dagblad van een borrelnoot iekuu getuigen.

Blijkt dat dat in sommige gevallen wel degelijk waar is.
Zie hier:
http://www.ad.nl/buitenland/article1671686.ece


Het artiekel gaat over een Amerikaansche Senator, die als spottende protest jegens frivole rechtszaken, tegen de allemachtige zelf een rechtzaak aanspant.

Het is dus een humoristisch actie, om een rhetorische punt te maken.

Velen onder de lezers van het Algemeen Dagblad kunnen dat niet begrijpen, hoewel het wel degelijk duidelijk gemaakt werd in het artiekel.
Kritisch lezen schijnt een gave te zijn deswelks de doorsnee lezer van minstens een Nederlandsche krant niet uitbundig geschonken is.

In tegenstelling tot het dagelijksche anti-Amerikaans venijn dat lezers normalitair onder artiekelen in dat nieuws-vod uitkotsen, zijn de reacties onder dat stukje om je ziek te lachen.
=============================
X
Artiekel in het NRC:
http://www.nrc.nl/binnenland/article767606.ece/Te_veel_scepsis%2C_te_weinig_dank

Citaat: " Nederland is niet solidair genoeg met de troepen in Afghanistan, vindt minister Van Middelkoop van Defensie. „De kritiek en de scepsis zijn te veel overheersend.""

Om ene schrijver van vorig jaar even te quoten: "Of die vriend nu bewust gekozen heeft voor het leger of voor zijn 'nummer' moest meevechten weet ik niet. In het eerste geval weet je dat dit het gevolg kan zijn indien je denkt dat je met wapens meningsverschillen kan oplossen."
[Dit was in reactie op een sneuvel bericht.]

Dus ik zou zeggen, haal die Nederlandsche manschappen terug uit Afghanistan. De doorsnee Nederlander waardeert hun absoluut niet - en het internet komentaar liegt er niet om - maar instede blijft alles wat met militairen en landsverdediging van doen heeft verfoeien en kasteiden.

Niet dat men Nederlanders van lafheid kan beschuldigen; bange wezels zijn het echt niet. Nee, wat verbale aggressie betreft munten zij ver boven de meesten uit. Maar kijk eens, het is typisch Nederlands om te verbalizeren, en tevens typisch Nederlands om terzelfdertijde afzijdig en ""neutraal"" te willen zijn.

Beter dus dat Nederland minder internationaal meedoet. En, in een Europeesche co-operatief kontext, hare strijdkracht afschaft. Men kan handhaving van vrede toch beter aan grotere buren overlaten.
=============================
XI
So, some Dutch troll-bitch is a member of a Columbian narco-Marxist gang.
And after fighting for the FARC for five years she's disillusioned. Turns out her own people are now concerned for her safety - they're worried sick, back there in the bog.

At least, the misguided many who praise her 'idealism'.

As far as I'm concerned the FARC should go right ahead and cut her throat. Internationalists who support terrorists deserve no better.

It's just like those Dutch citizens who are in Iraq - what a pity their bombelts don't explode ahead of time more often (and do you actually realize HOW MANY Dutch passports have been found in the Sunni triangle?).

It is quite understandable that in some circles there is great distrust of the Dutch; membership in that tribe guarantees no quality.
=============================
XII
Quoting once more from the person in that article: "How dare I speak - filthy rotten foreigners such as me should just piss-off and go back where I came from".

Well, that does sound very familiar - and in 1978 I did return from whence I came. Now Dutch tourists in SF ask me whether I wouldn't much rather live in the Netherlands.

To which the answer is nope. I no longer have any trace of Stockholm syndrome.

But gee, thanks for asking.
=============================

Hope y'all enjoyed the twelve extracts above. In Dutch, such a sampling is called a "bloemlezing" (a reading of the flowers). Scarce anything so poetic as flowers above, though.
But I've always prefered weeds anyway.

And if you've made it this far, so do you.

Thank you.

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Wednesday, January 23, 2008

TWO PLANNED ANTI-ISRAEL DEMOS IN SAN FRANCISCO

And, of course, counterprotests


Rabbosai,

I am posting this here in the hope that readers will forward the information to concerned parties - we need all the help we can get fighting anti-Semitism in Berkeley and San Francisco.

----- B.O.T.H.

[Cross-posted at: http://muqata.blogspot.com/ ]
===============================================

Help Counter Protest TWO Anti-Israel demonstrations outside the Israeli Consulate

Downtown San Francisco, 456 Montgomery Street
Friday, January 25, 12:00 - 1:00 PM AND 4:00 - 6:00 PM.

On Friday, from 12:00 - 1:00 PM, Jewish Voice for Peace will hold a protest vigil in front of the Israeli Consulate.

From 4:00 - 6:00 PM, A.N.S.W.E.R., the National Council of Arab Americans, Free Palestine Alliance, Al-Awda, and others will also demonstrate at the Israeli Consulate against Israel’s actions in Gaza.

[Note: A.N.S.W.E.R. is an extremist far-left front, the NCAA is a radical Arabist organization that opposes peace with Israel and has an anti-Semitic agenda, the Free Palestine Alliance is a pro-Hamas and pro-Hezbollah advocacy group, Al-Awda advocates the 'Palestine right to return' and favours of the complete dissolution/destruction of Israel.]


What these groups do not acknowledge is that Israel's actions are in response to a sustained barrage of missiles from Gaza into Israel - 450 in 10 days. They also fail to mention the murder of Carlos Chavez, a young kibbutz volunteer, targeted by a sniper from Gaza while planting potatoes.

The groups sponsoring this demonstration all demonize Israel as an "apartheid" state, endorse Israel’s destruction, and refuse to even acknowledge the violence the Palestinians perpetrated against Israel that led to Israel’s defensive actions.


Israel disengaged from Gaza in September 2005. In line with international demands, Israel opened border crossings with Gaza when there were no specific terrorist threats and turned over the Rafah crossing to the Palestinians with international observers. Despite this, the Gazan militant groups, many supported or funded by Hamas, intensified their rocket attacks into Israel.
The situation in Gaza is exploited by Hamas to deflect attention from its own role in creating it, but even the Arab media is skeptical. Just this week, Abdel Rahman Rashed, of the pan-Arab Arabiya news channel, said Hamas was responsible for the suffering of the 1.5 million Palestinians living in the Gaza Strip.


San Francisco Voice for Israel/Stand With Us will counter the anti-Israel/ pro-terrorism voice and genocidal hate and lies of the anti-Israel groups. Our presence in the past at these events has proven highly effective at countering their message and making sure that the anti-Israel activists can not push their propaganda on the public unopposed.

Please plan on attending at least one of these actions and bring your noisemakers, flags, and signs. As always, feel free to make your own signs but please no signs or graphics offensive to any racial or ethnic group including but not limited to Arabs, Islam, or Palestinians.
Signs in violation of our policies will not be allowed.

Demand an end to Palestinian rocket attacks against
Israeli civilians!
Demand Cpl Gilad Shalit be returned home safely!
Demand the Palestinian Authority put an end to terror
attacks!
Demand an end to the deligitimization and demonization
of Israel!
Demand the Palestinian Authority and their local
supporters choose peace so that the Palestinian people
can have a future!

San Francisco Voice for Israel/Stand With Us
http://www.sfvoiceforisrael.org/
http://www.blogger.com/www.StandWithUs.com


===============================================
Addendum I

Israel is trying to avoid a humanitarian crisis.
Israel sincerely strives for peace.
Israel is the aggrieved party in this conflict - since withdrawal from Gaza, rockets and other terror-attempts from Hamas-Gaza have increased enormously.

Hamas can afford rockets - why can't it improve the lives of its subjects?
Hamas and Palestinian activists are waging war on the civilians of Southern-Israel.
Hamas tries to kill civilians - that they are mostly unsuccesful is a miracle; it would be criminal to wait for them to become more efficient at that enterprise.

===============================================
Addendum II

MECA, which is one of the most hateful anti-Semitic groups, is co-sponsoring other protests elsewhere in the United States.

The following was taken directly from one of their helpful e-mails:

Anaheim, California: Saturday, Jan. 26, 1 p.m., 512 S. Brookhurst St., Between Orange Ave. & Broadway)

Boston: Thursday, Jan 24, noon; Israeli Consulate, Saturday, Jan 26, noon-1pm in Harvard Square

Chicago: Tues., Jan. 29, 5 pm at the Lakeshore Theater, 3175 North Broadway (at benefit for the Friends of the 'Israeli Defense Force'). Initiated by ISM. Call 773-463-0311 for more information.

Cleveland: Saturday, Jan 26; for more info contact donmbryant@yahoo.com

New York City: Saturday, Jan. 26, 1 p.m. at the Israeli Embassy, 43rd St. and 2nd Ave.

Philadelphia: Friday, Jan 25; Press Conference, Saturday, Jan 26, march to Israeli Consulate. Contact: rkamel@verizon.net

San Francisco, California: Friday, Jan. 25, 4-6 p.m., Israeli Consulate, 456 Montgomery St. (near California)

Seattle: Friday, January 25, 4 p.m., Westlake Park, 4th & Pine Sts.

Washington DC: Friday, Jan. 25 (time tba), at the Israeli Embassy, 3514 International Dr. N.W.

----------------------------

Please take part in counterprotests, and write to your congressleite and newspapers in your area regarding the hateful agendas and factual distortions of MECA and other groups.
If you do not take action, who will? And if not now, when?

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LANGUAGES

E-kvetcher also took the test. I discovered the link to the test on his blog. Read his blog: http://search-for-emes.blogspot.com/
It will do you good.




Your Score: Language Scholar


You scored a 360 out of 400 on language knowledge.



Outstanding! You've scored higher than even most Anthropology students would. You are probably a Linguistics or Anthropology Professor yourself (or at least a Grad student). You may even speak several languages and are possibly working on a new one. If not, then you just have an endless drive to learn about the different cultures of our world. Regardless, you are one of the gems of any society, always promoting a deeper understanding amongst all people. Unless you cheated of course.

Link: The World Languages Test written by jeremie096 on OkCupid, home of the The Dating Persona Test
View My Profile(jeremie096)

>

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

MY HERO!

Pursuant a mention of panties in a previous posting, and probably in reference to one of the characters from the manga series Ranma½ by Rumiko Takahashi, e-kvetcher sent me a cautionary note regarding a panty thief.

[Relevant previous posting: http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2008/01/more-manga-fun.html
Somewhat relevant previous posting which also mentions panties: http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2008/01/is-it-breast-thing-panties.html Ranma½: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ranma_%C2%BD Rumiko Takahashi <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rumiko_Takahashi]


I needs must quote from it, as it makes some intriguing reading.

"COLFAX, Washington - A man is facing a sentence of one-and-a-half months after admitting he stole 93 pounds of women's undergarments.
Garth Flaherty, 24, was charged with first-degree theft and burglary in the stealing of 1,613 pairs of panties, bras and other women's underwear from laundry rooms. "

"In his bedroom, police said, they found enough women's underwear to fill five garbage bags. "
[Source: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22782812/?GT1=10755]


Wow.
I am filled with admiration for mr. Flaherty's achievement. That truly takes dedication. Determination. Devotion. Skill. Enthusiasm.


And a boundless love of panties.


I suspect mr. Flaherty was inspired by Happosai - the character in Ranma½ for whom the pursuit of the elusive woman's undergarment is scarcely second to a passion for bosom.
[See here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happosai]


Happosai is the aged and shrunken teacher of both Ranma's dad and Soun Tendo (father of Kasumi, Nabiki, and Ranma's violent fiancée Akane).
He's also the very definition of 'elderly pervert'.
In case you didn't know, Happosai uses his great martial arts skills to steal women's underwear. Which is davka the purpose of all martial arts, don't you agree?


Post-scriptum: I shall not be sharing that opinion about martial arts with Savage Kitten, who has a brown belt in some super-violent Japanese version of chopsocky, and several gold and silver medals in some other martial art. I am not stupid. I would NOT want her to jump to the conclusion that her sensei (revered teacher) counted for little more than a clever pervert in my eyes.

[I'm already on plenty thin ice with her because of rumours of a panty-thing. Which I had nothing to do with, and I deny any involvement. I was somewhere else at the time, and I don't even know what panties are anyway - are they something that lives in the hills?]


I have nothing but deep respect for martial arts experts (even if some of them are skilled pantie-thieves).



==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:

LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================

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Monday, January 21, 2008

ACHER

The Other, Elisha Ben Abuya, one of four sages from the Tannaitic period who entered Pardes (Paradise, The Garden). He is called ‘the other’ because of his apikorsus (heresy).

Ben Azzai died, Ben Zoma lost his mind, Ben Abuya started whacking at everything with pruning shears (which is taken to mean that he lost his faith), and Akiva "entered in peace, and left in peace", allegedly going on to write what may be the oddest little book ever – the Sefer Yetzirah (the Book Of Creation).


Now note that ‘other’, or ‘one other’, is also a way of referring to the evil one. It is no coincidence that the realm of impurity is also ‘other’ (sitra achra: the other side).
But another account (in the Talmud, Meseches Kiddushin) relates that Elisha Ben Abuya once saw a boy on a ladder raiding a bird's nest as he was instructed to do by his father. The boy removed the mother bird, then accidentally fell from the ladder and died. This caused Elisha to doubt scripture, because it is written that one who obeys his parents, and one who removes a mother bird before taking her young (so that she does not suffer the sight of her children being taken) will both enjoy long life.


------Notes excerpted from 'Likutei ha Rabam'
[Yeshiva Chipas Emes Publishing and Dry-cleaners]




All of this pursuant an unreadable book discovered by e-kvetcher (http://search-for-emes.blogspot.com/) who mentions it here: http://search-for-emes.blogspot.com/2008/01/rabbi-yishmael-acher.html

I do not know what e-kvetcher is looking for precisely, but I can hazard a pretty loose guess. No matter..... He keeps discovering interesting things.

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MORE MANGA FUN

If you didn't think so before, after reading this you will be convinced that Japanese girls are either stark-raving bonkers or interesting and worth getting to know better.


A selection of four Japanese comics, readable on line.


1.Ichigo100% (Strawberry100%)

Manaka Junpei one day goes to the roof of his school to admire the view. While there, a beautiful school girl falls from the utility shed right on top of him, exposing her strawberry panties. The girl runs away before Junpei can find out her name. Junpei is enchanted by both the girl and the event itself, and even though he barely saw her face he is desperate to find the girl again - but all he knows about her is that she has a pair of strawberry-patterned panties.

It turns out that wearing Strawberry panties is not at all uncommon ......
http://www.onemanga.com/Ichigo100%25/


2.
Midori Days

Seiji Sawamura is the toughest brawler at his high-school, who can always be counted on to protect other students from bullies, thugs, and gangs. But he is really a lonely guy who wants nothing more than to find a girl-friend - a quest not helped by his roughness and reputation. One day he wakes up to discover that his right hand has become a miniature woman who loves him.

Midori is an extremely shy girl who has had a crush on Seiji for a long time; she went into a coma while her more extrovert side manifested itself as Seiji's hand. At the end of the series she returns to her own body, with no memory of the wonderful time she and Seiji spent together, but with enough courage to finally speak to him.

Despite the totally pervy premise, this is a rather sweet tale.
http://www.onemanga.com/Midori_no_Hibi/


3.Mysterious Girlfriend X

Urabe Mikoto is an antisocial girl who often sleeps at her desk. One day, fellow-student Tsubaki tries to wake her up after school is over, and accidentally tastes her drool - to which, because he has a crush on her, he becomes addicted.

Once he starts going out with her, he discovers that she carries around scissors in her panties - she is disturbingly skilled and quick with scissors.
http://www.onemanga.com/Mysterious_Girlfriend_X/


4.
Omamori Himari

Once Yuuto turned sixteen, the spell protecting him became ineffective and supernatural monsters try to kill him because he is descended from a long line of daemon-hunters. But his deceased parents had arranged for Himari - an ultra-violent and extremely curvaceous cat daemon-samurai girl - to protect Yuuto once the spell wore off.
There is only one problem: Yuuto is extremely allergic to cats.

Oh, and his girl-friend is not pleased by having the extremely curvy Himari living with him either.
http://www.onemanga.com/Omamori_Himari/


------------------------------------


There are also a few other great manga out there which cannot be read on-line, so you will have to borrow them from the library or hope that a degenerate friend buys them.


Hyper Police
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyper_Police
In the distant future the lines separating the world of demon-creatures and the world of humans have blurred. The humans are a small minority, officially protected and cared for by society.

The main characters in this manga are a cute spazzy underage electric cat-girl bounty hunter, and her tough werewolf colleague, who recruited her into the force and takes a protective interest in her; he has a monumental crush on her but is too shy to make a move, she is totally innocent about sexual matters and simply regards him as a very close friend with whom to commit mega-violence, explosive mayhem, and destructive acts.

This is one of the most enjoyable over-the-top manga out there. It is very twisted and very Japanese, and it teaches us two things about shapely teenage cat-daemons: Kahlua and cream will turn you into an outrageous drunk, and, apparently, licking someone and rubbing your scent all over them does NOT mean that you are in heat.



Kashimashihttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kashimashi:_Girl_Meets_Girl

After the girl to whom he confessed his love rejects him, Hazumu goes up the mountain outside of town to think things over, where a space-ship crashes into him and kills him. The aliens repair his destroyed body and revive him, but in the process have changed him into a her, all the way down to his dna.

His parents are overjoyed at this change (they always wanted a darling daughter), his best friend is furious (she appears to have had a secret crush on him), and the girl who rejected him before his gender-switch now passionately admits her love for her. This is a coming-of-age comedy about high-school students, with some affectionate lesbianism thrown in. Very sweet.



Yubisaki Milk Tea
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yubisaki_Milk_Tea
When his sister has a hot date, Yoshinori goes to the studio to tell the photographer that his sister cannot come for the scheduled photo-shoot of bridal gowns. He gets talked into modelling instead - a little dab of make-up, some padding, and the result is surprising. Because of this, he discovers that he likes cross-dressing.

The classmate he has a crush on will not talk to him unless he's in drag; she is uncomfortable around boys, and prefers him as a woman. The girl next door, on the other hand, is deeply in love with the boy she grew up with, and for most of the series does not realise that Yuki and Yoshinori are the same person.

His best friend also does not know that Yuki and Yoshinori are the same - and wants to date Yuki.


------------------------------------
------------------------------------


Just remember: Panties, school girl uniforms, operatic violence, and strange situations.
All good stories have these four elements. Plus occasionally, sushi.

Note: The sushi is especially useful if there is a shapely cat-daemon in your life. Cat-daemons love fishy things. They also like batting around the elves who make armour-piercing bullets, so you must occassionally distract them - with sushi.

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Wednesday, January 16, 2008

ABOUT LANGUAGE, WEXLER, AND HODGE-PODGE SCHOLARSHIP

A correspondent brings two writings to my attention, both of which have titles and content which must be considered disturbing, at the very least.


The Ashkenazic Jews: A Slavo-Turkic People in Search of a Jewish Identity
By Paul Wexler

The Non-Jewish Origins of the Sephardic Jews
By Paul Wexler

[Paul Wexler is a professor of linguistics at Tel-Aviv University. Using linguistic analysis he makes the argument in the first book that Ashkenazim are of non-Jewish origin, in the second, and by the same method, that Sephardim are the descendants of Berbers converted to Judaism. This per internet mentions of these books.]

Do any of my readers know about these books? Have you read them? What do others say about these books and their author?

I would really appreciate your feedback.

-----------------------------------------

I myself have not read either book. And, in that I ab initio take issue with both their contentions, and the ideology which would support them and be supported by them, it is incredibly unlikely that I would spend any money on either of these 'scholarly tomes'.
[I do not wish to enrich Paul Wexler.]

I doubt, I sincerely and thoroughly doubt, that the language one speaks must provide evidence of one's origin.
Consider the millions of Americans who by that evidence would be judged the descendants of Angles, Saxons, and Jutes. Or the hundreds of thousands of lawyers who then are clearly the distant relatives of Norman rapists and mediaeval French clerics. And the numerous groups all over Europe who, despite the names of their towns and provinces, are not Flemish, not Italian, not German, but French, Greek, and Slav.

To say nothing of the large number of pure Chinese and pure Polynesian (Melanesian) people in parts of Asia and the South Pacific who, evidently, are naught but Indonesians of odd appearance.

Among others. Among several many others.


I myself am of praedominantly Dutch ancestry, mixed with English and Scots-Irish.
I defy anyone to find conclusive proof of that in the language I use on this blog, or in my daily speech. Nor will they find any linguistic trace of the American Indian hidden deep in the family woodpile (who, I assume and hope, at least decently learned the New Jersey Dutch spoken by their glow-in-the-dark significant other). To say nothing of the Czechs and Slavs in one of the family pneumatophores.

Savage Kitten, as readers of this blog may have figured out, is of Cantonese extraction. There is not a trace of the proto-Thai some of her ancestors spoke a millennium ago in the American English she speaks and writes.
[Note: the Cantonese are considered to be in a significant part descendants of non-Chinese who were Sinified/Sinicized during the T'ang and Sung periods.]

In fact, judging by some terms which crop up in her daily speech, she is a former resident of Amsterdam pining keenly for the raw herring available at Van Altena's fishstand outside the Rijks Museum, whereas I am obviously an Indonesian Jew, and several of my friends are members of Monty Python's Flying Circus, or refugees from a Coen Brothers movie.

Please comment liberally.
Thank you.

PRAISE FOR THE JAPANESE

Two anti-whaling activists boarded a Japanese ship after trying to damage its propeller and throwing bottles of acid.

They are presently still on board - according to the organization to which they belong, they are being held by force, having been assaulted by the crew and tied to the radar mast. According to Japanese whaling officials, the two were not harmed, and such claims are untrue.

[See this article:http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7190957.stm]


Quote:
.....the men had illegally boarded the vessel after trying to damage its propeller and throwing bottles of acid.

A spokesman for Japan's Ministry of Foreign Affairs, Tomohiko Taniguchi, said that there was a strong desire on the Japanese side to return the two men.

Officials had contacted Sea Shepherd but received no response, he said.

A condition of the handover was that Sea Shepherd's inflatable boats agreed to remain 10 miles from Japanese vessels.

"If Sea Shepherd is not willing to do what the Japanese side wants them to do, I'm afraid it will take more time," he said.

Calling the two men hostages was incorrect, he added. "The two crew members were intentionally left behind on board."

Sea Shepherd, meanwhile, described a conditional release as unacceptable.
[End quote]


Forcefully boarding a vessel in mid-ocean is an act of piracy. Much as I sympathize with 'my cetacean fellow world-citizens', it seems to me that the two men should be simply dumped overboard, in lieu of being clapped in irons and eventually tried. I advocate clubbing them unconscious first, though - it would be more merciful. Though I doubt either that they deserve or would appreciate the kindness.


Australian Foreign Minister Stephen Smith said he expected the men to be returned "in a safe and secure condition".

The Aussie foreign minister should shut his honourable pie-hole.

This is outside his jurisdiction and none of his business. Two self-righteous nimrods puddling around the ocean intent on causing trouble are of concern only to those whom they inconvenience, and perhaps to their nearest and dearest - who should've counseled them against such a foolhardy course of action in the first place. Only one of the men (Benjamin Potts) is even Australian, by the way; the other (Giles Lane) is English.
This is NOT, by any stretch of the imagination, part of Mr. Stephen Smith's brief. Sticking his big Ozzie nose into this is no more than a bad case of post-colonial hubris.
[Furthermore, Australia does not rank high enough on the list of civilized nations to throw its weight around.]


The Japanese should not give into blackmail. Those two nuisances should rot until their organization agrees to terms.

I am not a proponent of whaling, and not overly fond of the Japanese (their military put paid to the sweetest bit of imperialist exploitation us Dutch-speakers every had going for us, and I count survivors of the death-camps in the East-Indies among friends and kin).
But this is not about whaling, it is about activist thuggery.

Restraining two hooligans who committed an act of piracy is perfectly legal.

Sinking the boats of their co-conspirators would also have been justifiable. Regretfully, this was not done. The Japanese are acting calmer and more rational than the Australians, and should be commended for it.



==========================================================================
NOTE: If you wish, you may contact me directly:

LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================

Labels:

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

CARLOS CHAVEZ

Please see this posting:
http://www.zionism-israel.com/log/archives/00000479.html


Quotes:"Today a man who came to work in peace, to help realize the dream of an egalitarian socialist society, or perhaps just to have a new experience, was murdered by Arab snipers. His death was hardly noticed, it seems.
A few years ago Rachel Corrie came to Israel to defend terrorists from "Zionist aggressors." She was killed by accident while trying to stop a bulldozer from destroying a building used for smuggling or terror attacks. Her death was trumpeted all over the world...."

"Carlos Chavez was not a reactionary imperialist warmonger illegal settler messianic fanatic - just a man growing food in a communal farm. For whatever reasons, he was planting potato seeds, not seeds of hatred. "

"David Lanos, 19, also a volunteer on the kibbutz, said the sniper fire came as they were preparing to plant potato seeds. "I told him, 'Sit down, they're shooting at us.' We managed to hide behind a car. When he stood up to get into it, he was hit in the back." "


All material cited above copyright of http://www.zionism-israel.com/log/.

May his memory be a blessing, and may those who grieve for him find comfort.

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SPLEEN - MUCH OF IT

Text underneath a photo on the BBC website:
"Palestinian relatives of the dead and Hamas vowed revenge. The rival Palestinian Fatah movement condemned what it called a "massacre", hampering its peace talks with Israel."


Folks, I'm getting sick and tired of the Palestinians. They always 'vow revenge', they always call whatever happened a 'massacre', and they always threaten that it will adversely affect the 'peace talks'.


There are no Palestinians. Such a people never existed, and still doesn't exist. They are a fiction of the Arab nations and Europeans. Those people are merely the failures of Egyptian, Jordanian, and Syrian societies. Mostly carpetbaggers, a few Bedouin. Plus some lost Turks, Circassians, and Albanian mercenaries. Drek, thugs, thieves, and pederasts.


We've seen what their revenge consists of. The killing of innocents. Pushing a wheelchair-bound American overboard. Brutally torturing an American diplomat in Khartoum. Blowing up airliners and buses. Slaughtering families. Murdering athletes.
Screw their revenge, and screw people who take their side. The entire Arab world isn't worth a heap of camel dung, and the majority of the Arabs world-wide are sodden with hypocrisy, narrow-mindedness, ill-manners, and sadistic tendencies. If the Socialist-Europeans and leftwing Americans want to take their side, that merely shows what a bunch of right bastards Socialist-Euries and lefty-Americans are. A pox on the Arabs, a pox on Islam, a pox on Socialist-Euries, and a pox on the American leftwing.
Muhammad and Karl Marx were not prophets but cynical snake-oil salesmen; the fact that those morons are still paying attention to them and their degenerate ideologies says much.

Why is that to the Socio-Euries and Arabs it is not a massacre when Jews or Americans get killed? Is that because the E's and A's are rotten to the very centre of their being? Or because they are evil, degenerate, and cruel? Probably the latter - European history is an unending list of bloody cruelties and exploitations, Arab history consists of slave-raiding, camel-buggery, and slow-murder.


And as for 'peace talks', the entire concept of talking peace with Arabs has lost all meaning. Arabs do not talk peace with any sincerity.
Europeans, as their own history proves, do not really understand the concept.

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Monday, January 14, 2008

EISHES CHAYIL MI YIMTZA VRACHOK MIPNINIM MICHRA

"A woman of valour, who can find, for her price is beyond rubies".
[Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:10]


Lamb shank with curry-paste, eggplant with savoury spices, and a fish.


Yes, these things are connected.

Yesterday I attended a meeting of one of the branches of the Great Zionist Conspiracy, Bay Area Chapter (meaning actually that I was at a small gathering of our tiny cadre of pro-Israel activists here in the mostly Israel-hating SF Bay Area). Two hours of klatshing. Constructive? Yes.


It left me with a screaming headache!


Do not conclude from this that the company of Jews makes me physically ill, however. The company of Jews is fine. The lack of caffeine, sugar, and protein for several hours was the culprit.
It must be primarily the lack of protein - I administered an emergency dose of caffeine and sugar shortly after the meeting ended, which did not significantly improve matters, but simply made me more alert to the symptoms.
Wide awake, so as to enjoy every spasm to the fullest extent possible.

I now understand why some people NEED to kiddush on shabbes morgen - the poor dears must sustain their heads.

I arrived home at six-thirty, nauseated and feeling like my head was going to explode. Pounding, throbbing, reverberating..... All bright lights hurt, all noises hurt, focusing my eyes hurt. Speaking hurt. Holding my head hurt, as well as NOT holding my head ("hmmmm, let's try that with only ONE hand.....").
Moaning also proved unpleasant. This was distressing, as sometimes I like to moan.
The inside of my cranium was a hard, nasty, and brutal place. My eyes felt like embers. Embers that had been pissed upon. I ached, I quivered, I cringed.


Shortly after I sat down, Savage Kitten had dinner on the table. Lamb. Eggplant. And a fish. Plus rice.


The head-ache was gone within an hour. Savage Kitten is a life-saver.
I hope she knows how much I treasure her.

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Friday, January 11, 2008

SCANDINAVIAN LITERATURE

This posting is for lovers of belles lettres and linguists, such as the scholars who have left comments on this post: http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2008/01/sing-of-killing-of-thurgi-son-of.html.
Whose further comments are hereby invited.

Note also that a well-rounded knowledge of Old-Norse and the Icelandic Sagas is essential for any real understanding of this material. We encourage you to at least read as much modern Scandinavian prose as you can before approaching the text below. Or watch some Ingmar Bergman movies while shnotzed on akvavit - the effect is depressingly similar.
------B.O.T.H.



Pursuant the fragment of Icelandic translated in a previous post, which mentioned the ancestry of Blurk Of The Unpronounceable Name and the clubbing to death like a baby harp-seal of his distant cousin at the other end of the island because of questionable appearance, here is some more information.

Blurk Of The Unpronounceable Name was the descendant of Barfsack the Buggerer, whose father was unknown, but who may have also been the father of the bastard of Ugliest She-Thing In The North (a pig-maiden), half-sister of Barfsack the Buggerer (whose father is unknown).

Barfsack the Buggerer begat Greatwart Half-Ape (accidentally).

But according to manuscripts in a Swiss university, Greatwart Half-Ape was actually Barfsack the Buggerer's grandson - Barfsack's son being Giuseppe the Epithetless, also known as Giuseppe the Harmless (who had a surfeit of gorm). This may be the same man as Giuseppe the Hopelessly Lost (an itinerant cobbler), as mentioned in the Annals of Bermfokke (Norway).

[There is an amusing passage in the Annals of Bermfokke (Norway) that relates in great detail how Giuseppe was accidentally "caused to be embarrassed" by Barfsack the Buggerer, who couldn't tell him apart from his oxen in the dark (the same theme is reflected in the modern Danish folksongs "Sitz Oyf Es Un' Mach Vi A Draeidl" and "Kretsj Nisjt Aza Chazirisj", among others - it is a popular subject).]

Greatwart Half-Ape begat Gargle the But-ugly. Gargle the But-Ugly begat Blurk of the Unpronounceable Name.
Blurk of the Unpronounceable Name clubbed his cousin to death before sitting down to a fish dinner.

Which proves that, in Scandinavia at least, fish 365, bad temper, and bone-crunching ugly go together. Along with sex.

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Thursday, January 10, 2008

SINGING LIKE CHIPMUNKS

One of my favourite anthems remains the Internationale. Yes, I know that for many people it has bad connotations. Historical mistakes of monumental proportion, bloodshed, tyranny - the spectacular failure of the entire communist movement to present a humanist side. I cannot help it, it is still a great song. Rousing. Aspiring. Hopefull.
[And it's French, as this article explains:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Internationale
The French, you will recall, are also the owners of that other great anthem, La Marseillaise, written by Captain Claud Joseph Rouget de Lisle.]


Here is the Internationale in Russian:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTMQJi_wDi8&feature=related

Here it is sung by Norwegian Smurfs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdxpnqF1x0U
[And yes, the similarity between Smurf society and the ideal socialist workers paradise envisioned by Marx and Engels is striking - including, disturbingly, the scarcity of women.
I like women.]

Here's version that would've given Hitler a kramp in di kishkes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXKr4HSPHT8&feature=related

If you thought the song was strictly old-school, here's the Leuven Socialists doing a sincere but anemic rendition on MayDay 2007:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vu7RdtuEVss&feature=related

And this is probably how you remember it best if you're American - the version from the movie Reds (preceded by some old-style lefty gibberish):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDY0BAe_qGQ


These are the lyrics:

DE INTERNATIAUNALE

Ontwaak! veworrepene deâh Aahde
Ontwaak! vedoem in hongren sfeâh
Reidlijk wille straum auvâh de Aahde
En die straum rès al meâh en meâh
Sterref, gè âhwe vorme en gedache
Slaaf geboâhnen, ontwaak! ontwaak!
De weireld stuint op nieuwe krache
Begeâhte hep ons aangeraak

Makkers! ten laaste male
Tot de strèd ons geschaagt
En de Internatiaunale
Zâh morge heâhse op Aahd!
Makkers! ten laaste male
Tot de strèd ons geschaagt
En de Internatiaunale
Zâh morge heâhse op Aahd!

De staat vedruk; de wet is lauge
De rèkaahd leif zellefzuchtag voâht
Tot t merg wogt d'arreme ùitgezauge
En zèn rech is een èdel woâhd
Wè zèn t moe naah andrâh wil te leive
Broedars! hoâht hoe gelèkhèd spreik
Gein rech waah plich is opgeheive
Gein plich leâht zè waah rech ontbreik

Makkers! ten laaste male
Tot de strèd ons geschaagt
En de Internatiaunale
Zâh morge heâhse op Aahd!
Makkers! ten laaste male
Tot de strèd ons geschaagt
En de Internatiaunale
Zâh morge heâhse op Aahd!

De heâhsers doâh dùivelse liste
Bedwelme ons met bloedgen damp
Broedars! strèdt nie meâh voâh andrâh twiste
Breik de rèje hieâh is uw kamp
Gè die ons tot helde wil make
Au! Barbare denk wat gè doet
Wè hebbe waapnen hen te rake
Die dorstag schène naah ons bloed

Makkers! ten laaste male
Tot de strèd ons geschaagt
En de Internatiaunale
Zâh morge heâhse op Aahd!
Makkers! ten laaste male
Tot de strèd ons geschaagt
En de Internatiaunale
Zâh morge heâhse op Aahd!


Yes, I know you cannot understand those lyrics. You aren't meant to. I do not want you to sing it. Communism was a ghastly failure, and I have no wish for you to repeat the errors of the past. I encourage you to make your own horrid mistakes.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

GOALS UPDATED, NOW AND HERE!

Our HR department has been a right yenta to everybody, reminding us every other day that we need to turn in our goals for the year.

This is something we do on a yearly basis.
Our "goals" are supposed to be 'new-and-improved' every time.
Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-bound.
Pro-active. With action verbs and out-of-the-box thoughts. Concrete.

......errm?

I'm a beancounter.

My goals do not change, neither does my job.

I do not deal in vague, unquantifiable garbage.

I am not in Marketing, nor in Sales.


How do I write, in acceptable career-speak, that I simply want to do the same thing as last year, without customers or salespeople screaming at me too often, without overmuch oversight, or irrelevant input from other departments, and without being told how to save the planet feed the starving conserve energy husband resources avoid sugar consider vegetarianism sponsor a child pray for peace plus an end to world hunger everybody happy our troops the president and the democratic candidate?

Sorry, that question is a bit long and hence confusing, let me shorten it for you...... "Can't you please shut up?!?"


I know they're not interested in my real goals.

Sleep more. Read interesting stuff. Understand the parshas better. Learn more of other languages. Stuff more into my memory. Eat things I haven't eaten before. Avoid dealing with the inane.

Seriously, I need to get back up to speed with Chinese - I guess that means rereading a whole bunch of stuff, including MengTze, SunTze, Six Records of a Floating Life, Under The Red Banner, plus a whole lot of Ba Jin and the Chinese translation of Ranma½.
And re-watching all my favourite Hong Kong Gangster flicks.

Can do. This is realist and concrete. With action verbs, and without a box. There is no box.

I also want to take a stab at learning Japanese - my favourite manga series have not been fully published in English yet, and I'm desperate to find out what happens next. Some of the tales have not even been officially translated - there are rogue translations on the internet, but these get taken down once the copyright holders discover them and kick up a fuss. Plus many of the manga sites are infested with groisse perverts looking for chibi, ultra-moe, and hentai....... Or little girlie-women who just wuv(!) childish characters with big shiny round eyes and cuuuute big round heads.
Plus flowers, butterflies, widdle doggie-woggies, and other loveable vomit. It's a saccharine swamp out there.

Is there a manga about a fully dressed thirty-year old Hispanic woman who drinks Jameson and arm-wrestles rednecks?

If there is, it'll never be translated.
And I just gotta read it.
Betcha she finds tattoos and piercings just as silly as I do.
With tons of action verbs.

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NOW SING OF THE KILLING OF THURGI THRALL-ARSE, THE SON OF OLAF STANKEFISK, OH SKALD!

Pursuant this post http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2008/01/shapeless-and-confusing.html, Lipman left a comment that had me in stitches.

As a side-note to introducing an Icelandic blogger, I had mentioned that I had struggled through Old Norse (and Old English) texts.


Lipman wrote:
"I did that too, back in the halls of The University. Fascinating language, but the content of any random part of the sagas is basically:

" X [name unpronounceable to most, containing at least a pre-aspirated long T or sommmink] takes his club, says "Honey, I might be late for dinner, see to it that the fish don't stink too much", goes to the other end of the island to his neighbour's hut and knocks him dead. "-"



So true, so very true.

The only addition I would make is that X of the unpronounceable name is the son of Hack-spit the Rapist, who is the son of Gargle the But-ugly, the son of Greatwart Half-ape, son of Barfsack the Buggerer, whose half-sister was known all the way to Asgard as the ugliest she-thing in the north - famous as herder of pigs and elderly virgin, though eventually and illegitimately great-grandmother of the chap about whose dead-knocking we are forced to read at length. Who had offended by looking funny.

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Tuesday, January 08, 2008

SHAPELESS AND CONFUSING

In a comment underneath a previous posting, e-kvetcher (http://search-for-emes.blogspot.com/) alerts me to a new and fascinating blog.

A blog which describes itself as a shapeless and confusing monstrosity. The blog of a scholar in Iceland.


Now, before I continue, please do not make jokes about Icelandic Bee Honey. It would be in extremely bad taste to do so. And possibly cruel and beside the point. Let there be no japing with the concept of an Icelandic Bee Honey vending person.


To demonstrate:
Man: A strong hive of bees contains approximately 75,000 bees. Each honey bee must make 154 trips to collect one teaspoon of honey. Hello, sir.
Dad: What do you want?
Man: Would you like to buy some of our honey, sir?
Mother: What you doing in here?
Man: Which would you like, the Californian Orange Blossom, the Mexican, the New Zealand, or the Scottish Heather?
Mother: He can't eat honey. It makes him go plop plops.
Man: Come on, please try some.
Dad: All right I'll have some Icelandic Honey.
Man: No, there is no such thing.
Dad: You mean you don't make any honey at all?
Man: No, no, we must import it all. Every bally drop. We are a gloomy people. It's so crikey cold and dark up there, and only fish to eat. Fish and imported honey. Oh strewth!
Mother: Well why do you have a week?
Man: Listen Buster! In Reykyavik it is dark for eight months of the year, and it's cold enough to freeze your wrists off and there's only golly fish to eat. Administrative errors are bound to occur in enormous quantities. Look at this - it's all a mistake. It's a real pain in the sphincter! Icelandic Honey Week? My Life!
Mother: Well why do you come in here trying to flog the stuff, then?
Man: Listen Cowboy. I got a job to do. It's a stupid, pointless job but at least it keeps me away from Iceland, all right? The leg of the worker bee has.......

[source: http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode45.htm#2]

You see?
It is painfull.



The blog I wish to flog, however, is not stupid, not pointless, nor gloomy, dark, or crikey cold.

A brief excerpt will make that obvious:
"I managed until the age of twenty to avoid all girls and their pesky kisses. A great feat! At the age of twenty a woman who I considered my friend decided to kiss me, and more seriously, managed to persuade me to kiss her back after hours of hard work. Today I do not consider her my friend. Some time later I decided to kiss another girl. It had consequences."

The author currently has no intention of kissing another girl unless marriage is involved.


Another excerpt:
"The Germans were supposedly abstinent until the age of twenty (Caesar) which contributed to their stature and strength, and furthermore were generally faithful to their companions (Tacitus), although it was often out of fear. The Romans on the other hand were pederastic and enjoyed a number of orgies (supposedly). Basically, Germans, strict social rules, Romans, libertines and deviants."


And, to show the breadth of this blog, a third excerpt:
" - Hins vegar er það trúlegra, að refirnir séu nægilega djarfir og lagnir til þess að klifra í snarbratta kletta eftir álkueggjum einir síns liðs." - "

For more, please visit:
http://shapelessandconfusingmonstrosity.blogspot.com/

The author of said blog writes in English. Which is good. Most of us do not understand Icelandic. Stop by and say howdy.

--------------------------------------------------------------

To please my mother, I whacked my way through several Icelandic sagas at one point. It was dense going, just like my experience with Old-English (which was also to please her - Old-English, Old-Norse, and Old Irish were her subjects at college).


I particularly enjoyed Grettir's tale, which is described here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grettis_saga
Given in the original language here:
http://www.sagadb.org/grettis_saga
And in English here:
http://www.sagadb.org/grettis_saga.en

It is stirring.

Read it, and realize that this is a living language, still spoken by such people as Shapeless And Confusing Monstrosity, the descendant of Clubfoot and Smiter, who is undoubtedly related to both Thorod the Godi as well as Thorir of Garth.

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Monday, January 07, 2008

IS IT A BREAST THING? PANTIES!

It has been one heck of a weekend.

Savage Kitten and I spent all of Saturday and Sunday in the sack.

No, it's not what you think.
Would that it were. And had it been, I would certainly NOT be posting about it.
Instead, it was disease.

On Saturday I sounded most like leaky steampipes, on Sunday she surpassed me.


Hack, spit, cough. Hoest, rochel, kuch. Braaaaaaachchchch!


So what do a sick toad and a sick kitten do when bedbound by respiratory distress?

They read.

As you may have noticed from some previous entries, I'm on a manga kick. Current series I'm reading are:


Lady Snow Blood (修羅雪姫, Shurayuki-hime - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady_Snowblood )
A totally bonzo gloomy splatter saga with moody illustrations. Blood, death, gore, and cold hard steel.


Chibi Vampire (かりん, Karin - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karin_(manga)
A sweet off-the-wall tale about a shy and easily embarrassed defective vampire and the fellow high-schooler she has a crush on - in volume six, matters come to a head, she very nearly admits her feelings, and the last page is a cliff-hanger.
Volume seven does not come out for several more weeks, volume eight sometime in Spring.


GTO - Great Teacher Onizuka (グレート・ティーチャー・オニヅカ, Gurēto Tīchā Onizuka - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Teacher_Onizuka ).
Horndog biker slacker college grad decides to become a teacher after peeping up girls skirts at the mall. But having gone into teaching, he discovers that he is handicapped with a sense of ethics that prevents him from exploiting people. Seemingly he is the only person in the classroom he teaches who is so cursed, as his teenage students consist of thuggish louts, hot sluts, blackmailers, nasty girls, young toughs, and violent sleazebags. It's a darn good read.


Both Chibi Vampire and GTO are funny. Lady Snow Blood is only humorous if you are warped. Or have a brutal sense of irony.

This is Japanese literature at it's finest.

----------------------------------------------


NOTE - OTHER MANGA SERIES WORTH MENTIONING:

Ranma½ (らんま½ - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ranma_%C2%BD)
I already read all of Ranma½ in Chinese, so I kinda lost interest in the English-language version a while back. But it's a fun series, and well worth reading.

InuYasha (犬夜叉 - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/InuYasha)
After a while it becomes repetitive. Just how much can you read about a high-school girl and a dog-demon? Evenso, it is very beautiful.


Both Ranma½ and Inuyasha are by Rumiko Takahashi, a very well-known mangaka, whose other works are also worth looking into. Lum (Urushei Yatsura), Rumic World, Rumic Theatre, Maison Ikkoku - some very good reading here.


Ai Yori Aoshi (藍より青し - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ai_Yori_Aoshi).
If you're a male, this is a likeable piece of sexist fluff, and an incredibly easy read - primarily because not much goes on, for sixteen chapters, at the end of which childhood sweethearts Kaoru Hanabishi and Aoi Sakuraba finally do get married. It is all very easy on the eyes, and illustrates abundantly that the Japanese have a breast-fetish that beats Americans out of the water. They trump us, we might as well admit it, their breast-thing is far bigger than ours.

As is their panty thing - I don't think Americans even have a panty thing to speak of.

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Thursday, January 03, 2008

I AM DANGEROUS

21


Of course, this puts me way ahead of Dovbear. Who, apparently, is all sweetness and light. Compared to me.

Vi sogt man "yeehaw!" oyf Teitsh?
 
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