Monday, June 09, 2008

ORANJE VERNEDERT WERELD KAMPIOEN

Sorry, Spiros, couldn't resist. The title of this post is the headline that appeared on the Algemeen Dagblad site after the match against Italy.
Translation: "Orange HUMILIATES world-champion".

I guess you've probably figured out that the Dutch won.


Of course, the AD is a crappy source for news. So lets go to another source, marginally less crappy - the BBC:

Netherlands took a firm grip on Euro 2008's so-called "Group of Death" by winning a classic encounter with Italy.

Ruud van Nistelrooy put the Dutch ahead in controversial circumstances after 26 minutes when he scored from close range - but also from an offside position.

Wesley Sneijder swept in a second from Dirk Kuyt's header five minutes later.

Edwin van der Sar then denied Italy with stunning saves from Fabio Grosso and Andrea Pirlo before Giovanni van Bronckhorst headed in after 78 minutes.

[Source: http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/euro_2008/7363339.stm ]


The score was 3 - 0.

[Oooooh, was it sad at the Steps of Rome? Were all the folks jammed into the place watching the match ...... disappointed? So sorry. My piles bleed for them. Alas, poor Italy. Weep weep, wail wail, gnash gnash. Ooooooh.!!!! Oh well. Pie.]

There were no little Catholic schoolgirls involved, nor any Japanese schoolgirls. So from my point of view it actually means very little. No pantsu. No yuri. No sideboob. No shojo ai. No accidental grope or face-pie. No mahou maid or nekomimi. No megane, strap-on fox tails, or short short skirts. Why do people watch this game anyhow?


It is also unlikely that this will have any bearing on my three known obsessions.

Additionally, it will not be a reason for me to discover a new and sickening cocktail. I will not be waving any flags, or painting my face orange. I will not go on an all-night drinking binge in Berne, finishing with a refreshing oral expulsion of stomach-contents off a bridge as the sun comes up.
No repetitive songs and chants of ole ole ole with ten thousand other cheese.

Instead, immediately after posting this, I will continue reading Yuri to Boushi to Hon no Tabibito.


In other news, the J-blogs are remarkably quiescent today. Betcha a number of them will be lamenting lactose intolerance tomorrow. Happy chag ha blintzim, y'all.

--------------------------------------------
UPDATE: Gratuitous insult: "Italiani languide checche!"
This in cheerful response to the gentleman who opined 'Olandesi tutti froci!'
And neener neener neener to you. Have you seen the videos of the Olandesi in the Bundesplatz? This was indeed la notte piu nera for the squadra azzura.
Pa-a-a-artaaayy!!!!!!!
--------------------------------------------

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ha! Olandesi tutti froci!

Spiros said...

Two points:
1.)I don't recall Italy EVER winning the Euro Cup.
2.)Who won the 2006 World Cup? Was it Holland? I DON'T THINK SO!

The back of the hill said...

I don't recall Italy EVER winning the Euro Cup.

Neither do I.

Who won the 2006 World Cup?

Good question. Meh, can't remember. Some headbutter?

Anonymous said...

All the Dutch are mad cheeses.

ITALIA are number one.

The back of the hill said...

Number one what?

The back of the hill said...

Oh, and by the way - Cheeses saves.


Sorry. Judging by your eccentric use of our language, you may not understand the horrid word play. Much as, clearly, you do not understand sport. Sorry. I shouldn't make fun of you. You are to be pitied. And your team lost. They lost. They lost exceedingly. Sorry.

The back of the hill said...

The match was three - nil.
I cannot remember the squadra azzura ever being quite so humiliated. Did I mention that they lost? Exceedingly?

Sorry. Poor you.

The back of the hill said...

Exceedingly = eccessivamente.


Adverb: Definition: extremely: to an unusually high degree
You've been exceedingly generous.

---------
Very much, in other words. A whole lot. They lost exceedingly: they lost big-time. They lost like they've never lost before. They got their posteriors handed to them on a platter. The Dutch team grabbed them by the nasties and swept the floor with them. They lost utterly, horribly, flabbergastingly. Could they have lost any worse? The answer is no, they could no worse have lost. They lost exceedingly.

Sorry. You must be feeling horrible right now. Have some grappa - it dulls the pain. Avoid caffeine for a while. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

Dutcher stupide!

The back of the hill said...

Anonymous stupider!

Anonymous said...

I am with H.B. on this one - here in my little bit of Germany the natives are well pleased that their prized (Polish) Fussballer put 2 in the net against his relatives

http://www.rp-online.de/public/bildershowinline/regional/niederrheinnord/kleve/nachrichten/34342

But soccer does nothing for me - 22 dimwits in shorts - not a whiff of perfume anywhere - no jet-fighters - what's the point?

Graham

Anonymous said...

http://www.rp-online.de/public/bildershowinline/regional/niederrheinnord/kleve/nachrichten/34342

might work better

;-O

The back of the hill said...

Graham,

Much as sports bores me to tears, soccer is still better than what we call 'football' over here - being an entertainment provided by twenty-two steroid meatballs pounding each other into the astro-turf.

I have tried watching it. The most appealing part is when the "players" crouch down behind each-others posteriors - an action the point of which escapes me - their rumps look like day-glow horses' behinds at that point, because of the taught-stretched shiny synthetic fabric. Very Grecian.

That aside, it's like watching the orcs from Lord of the Rings. But without the splendid grunting and screeching.

If I had to chose a favourite sport it would probably be field-hockey played by..... (wait for it) ...... high-school girls.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps all sports are about rumps.

Anonymous said...

Oh go cook yourself, you dammed haughty Dutchy.

The back of the hill said...

Go cook myself? Why? You're the one who got stewed.

Anonymous said...

Che cazzo, stronzo!

The back of the hill said...

All the Dutch are mad cheeses

A day later, this actually seems more like a compliment than otherwise.

Yes, I think I like the idea that I/we are 'mad cheese'.

I am mad cheese, hear me roar.

Anonymous said...

God you're a miserabele knuter!

Anonymous said...

Anonimous Italiano detti…
Ha! Olandesi tutti froci!


siete così sicuro dovete avere esperienza…

Dolph said...

Spiros:
1.)I don't recall Italy EVER winning the Euro Cup.

The Euro Cup is not a game for countries but for clubs. A club must be a country champ to attend.
AC Milan won the Cup in 2007, 2003,1994,1990,1989
Juventus in 1996, 1985

Who won the 2006 World Championship (World Cup)?
The WC matches are every 4 years
2006 - Italy
2002 - Brazil
1998 - France
1994 - Brazil
1990 - Germany
1986 - Argentina

Who won the European Championship
The EC matches are every 4 year
2008 ???? Probably not Italy
2004 - Greece
2000 - France
1996 - Germany
1992 - Denmark
1988 - The Netherlands

Salut

Dolph said...

Italian Anonimous, your comments are as good as last Mondays result of the Italian Soccer team.

The Big Little Tommy said...

Ya'll can have your skirts, the ONLY thing I like about soccer is those cute little shorts! AND Back of the Hill is sooooo right on with
"...'football' over here - being an entertainment provided by twenty-two steroid meatballs pounding each other into the astro-turf..."

Laugh out Loud on that one, touche"

Spiros said...

Cheers, Dolph; I'm still suffering from the result of this most recent Euro Cup (I found myself going from not really caring to pulling for Chelsea midway through the match). Obviously I meant to imply that forza azzuri have never won the European championship, at least not in my memory.
I can't say that I would feel insulted by being called a "mad cheese". In fact, as a cheese making nation, I would have to rate Italy significantly higher that Holland, if not quite as high as France or Britain.

Anonymous said...

There is a lot of latent fascism in Italian football

In fact there is an awful lot of latent facism in Italy

two years ago an old crone in Rome spat at me - because I was talking to my clients (wise & funny Chinese gents from Guangdong) - in English

All roads may lead to Rome
that belongs in the Lonely Planet guide for tramps

Rome sucks

I can enjoy Tuscany - but truly people

ROME SUCKS!!!

It still smells of Mussolini

Must Italian demagogues names end in INI

sounds like WEENIE?

Graham

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