SNOW WEASELS

Tomorrow, according to Indy Bay, there will be a "nude run for human rights" along the Embarcadero. Timed to coincide with the Olympic Torch run.

http://www.indybay.org/newsitems/2008/04/04/18490617.php

It is being put together by George Davis (naked yoga guy), and has been endorsed by nudes4peace.
[nudes4peace: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/nakity/ ]

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While I'm royally pissed that all the crackpots are coming out the woodwork to make a spectacle of themselves tomorrow in San Francisco (get ye back to Berkeley, rabble!), I heartily approve of the nude run for human rights.

I myself will NOT be taking part. I should not be seen in public in the buff. Thank me, I'm not a giver.
But I am very much looking forward to seeing elderly nakedies huffing down the Embarcadero, rubbed all over with baby oil because the original Olympians covered themselves with olive oil.
[I guess the substitution with baby oil is to keep people from licking them. I don't know.]

There's nothing quite so intellectually stimulating as the thought of out-of-shape nudies trotting from the cops, slipping around on their own oil, and wheezing asthmatically. In public.

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But more than likely they'll bail.

Not that they're anyways shy about showing off their grosser parts in a mixed crowd, good heavens no.

They probably just don't want to freeze their saggy butts off.

It is cold here.

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It is cold, windy, unpleasant. Bone chilling. This is not naked weather. This is the kind of weather in which you bundle up in your bed with an extra comforter, listening to the snow weasels outside clacking their little cutleries as they try to get in to eat you.
[Snow weasels come down from the north during cold weather to consume humans, bringing their heirloom table-silver with them (for convenience, and that sense of home). There's a trail all the way up to Alaska littered with the bones of their victims. Or so Savage Kitten tells me during cold spells such as this, as she holds on to me tightly trying to absorb all of my warmth. Heat vampire.]

How do we know that snow weasels eat humans? Simple - no one has ever lived to tell the tale of encountering the little beasties. They're that clever. And that ferocious. Ravenous little carnivores.

They probably don't eat elderly exhibitionists, though.

Too stringy.

And too oily.