THAT COUNTRY

Several Republican politicians, with the support of the older stiffer members of their constituancies, have made "white America" or a "whiter America" central to their election campaigns. I too dream of a day and age when the only permissible toppings for toast are A) Anchovy spread; B) Sriracha hotsauce or similar sambal type preparation; C) Marmalade; D) Italian preserved meats, like good salami. And of course, every body should enjoy a nice chicken curry for Sunday dinner, and stay the heck away from the church, because, you know, rowdy ignorant people go there.
Folks we don't talk to. Those people, dear, not our type.

Vulgar public displays of religion.


But I am guessing that ain't the program they're aiming for.

Coffee, tea, and good food are not a white American heritage. The white America of which they dream ate Spam, Jello molds with chicken meat and chopped olives, and canned yam delite. Served on check tablecloths, with tiki drinks and grape soda. That America's greatest achievements were tuna casserole and cocktail umbrellas.

Their America created 'steamed broccoli'.


Lord knows I don't want that living next door to me, there's enough Christian trash nearby already. Steamed broccoli!


Tell you what, guys, I promise I won't visit Florida and Oregon -- pretty much the default white people heavens anyhow -- provided you all keep quiet and stay home. And you need not worry about a brain drain. We've already got plenty of educated people. So you have nothing to fear.



Deal?




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