Thursday, July 18, 2019

A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE

Appendicitis: 急性闌尾炎 ('kap sing laan mei yim'). Appendectomy: 闌尾切除術 ('laan mei chit cheui seut').
Live In Hong Kong: 香港直播 ('heung kong jik po').


Now that I've had appendicitis, I doubt that I'll do that again. It's absolutely no exaggeration when I say that the last five days have been very educational. Not only about screaming agony -- which I resisted acting appropriately upon, because howling like wolf chewing off it's leg to get away from the steel jawed trap is just plain undignified -- but also about what may be the best news programme on four wheels: 香港直播. And about Doctor Poon's bizarre obsession with post-operative laxation.
Doctor Poon (not her real name) lectured me sternly, uncaring how embarrassing the results might be. And prescribed for stool.
Even though she also wanted me to get up and walk.

My, this is a lovely ward filled with sick old people you have here, it's so nice and clean! It would be a shame if something horrible were to happen to it, huh?

I should have emphasized that a bit more. Three times more.
Some of the most patient nursing staff in history.
They were extraordinarily tolerant


Important concepts: 腹膜炎,敗血症,糞石。
Peritonitis ('fuk mou yim'), Sepsis ('paai huet jing'), Fecalith ('fan sek').


Of course, it probably helped that I tried limiting mishaps to the bed, the bathroom, the area in front of my room, and the area in between.
I am iron-willed, and have a carbon-steel arse.
Could rip a leg off a wolf with that.



I've spent nearly a week in agony, that wolf better run for its life.




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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Welcome back to the digital world. I was beginning to worry about you as I had not seen any blog or FB posts for several days. Sorry to hear about your latest medical mishap. Did Dr Poon blame everything on your vile tobacco habit?
M

The back of the hill said...

Nah, she didn't even mention tobacco. Except as a fourth day afterthought, because there is a "have you mentioned smoking?" checkbox.

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