THERE WILL BE PUDDING!

The internet is a fascinating place. While scrolling though facebook what met my eye was this stellar phrase: "But, alas, cat urination on your mattress is one of those dilemmas that some pet parents deal with."
It was written by someone from PetMD. Remove just two words, and it describes the quandary many people have vis-à-vis their repulsive brood.
It is a metaphor for why your relatives should never have had kids.

I like children, I really do. Sometimes the little monsters can be quite charming, fascinating even. While I was in line at Walgreens on Stockton Street, I heard a little Chinese girl happily singing out "mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine!"
She had a cup of hermetically sealed pudding in her hands.
She wasn't loud, she wasn't obnoxious.
Just incredibly focused.
Glowing.


Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine!


Maybe she does pee in the mattress. Statistically, it is a possibilty. Not necessarily probable, and probably not likely even. But children are somewhat more apt to wet the bed than (most) grown-ups.
This is something you should keep in mind if you ever decide to breed.
Can you afford a frequent change of bed?

Rewarding you kid with pudding occasionally is a small price to pay for dry sheets, domestic harmony, and peace of mind.
Always budget for pudding.


Most people never think of that.




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