AMERICANS ARE BIG FAT TURDS

If you didn't know it already, obesity rates are enormous (horrid word play intentional), diabetes is sky-rocketing, and Americans -- especially in the rust belt states and the dip south -- are second only to Pacific Islanders for girth and waddle waddle waddle.


Sentence found in an article:

" ... more than a third of all children and adolescents living in the country still eat some form of fast food on any given day, a number that hasn't budged in decades, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention."

[SOURCE: Striking new side effect from fast food, Wonkblog, Washington Post.]


It's true; you are all fat-axe folgers. In adulthood you still eat like that.

I, on the other hand, am a thinnish man. Pipesmoker, middle-aged, and likely to live a hell of a lot longer and happier than most of you people.

Would y'all mind terribly not leaving a mess when you croak?

I am far too lazy and unwilling to clean up after.




I really think that instead of raisinets and greasy stale popcorn at the concession stand, they should sell bowls of stirfried mustard greens with shrimp paste, or fish-flavour eggplant. Of course, they'd probably charge ten times more than the nearest Chinese restaurant, and your bloated little sponge-monster brats would whine that they wanted candy, but it would be better for you. Much better.
Tastier, too.

America: country of elephant-size undies.

And sweaty rolls of pudge.

Ick poo.



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