FREAKY LITTLE FINGERS

A very good friend avers out that I have written more about Donald Trump than about nipples, and consequently questions my heterosexuality.

"Dude, " he writes, "what is it with you and Der Donald? You are hung up on him, and have written about nearly nothing else for MONTHS!"

A slight exaggeration.


"What happened to your obsessession with womens' lovely nipples?!? Trump? Gottenyu, have you gone gay on us???"


Well now. Obessession? I like them, yes, but I would hardly describe it as an obsessession. An unpeculiar fondness, perfectly normal.

Nor am I obsessessed with Donald Trump. Any part of his anatomy.
Not even his short ugly troglodytic stubby fingers, which look like little misshapen larvae. Really, they are repulsive. Extremely.
And especially not his nipples.

Not hung up


But my friend does have a point.

On this blog, there are seventeen essays labelled Trump.
And only half a dozen under the rubric Nipples.


This indeed could be considered peculiar. If that is all there was to it.
But trump is like a mutant, and therefore merits frequent highlighting, whereas nipples are a happy fact of life. Two happy facts of life. One regards them with warm fellow feeling, but does not stress the matter, as one presumes that many (most) other people are already quite familiar with their existence, and have their own happy thoughts about them.
Their own, or someone else's. Especially someone else's.
Indeed, nipples are a very great good.

Bless the nipples.


One minor matter, other than his unnatural tan, that does fascinate me is the length of his fingers. Or lack thereof. I find such short stubby digits repulsive, and possibly indicative of either a glandular imbalance or a regrettable genetic narrowness.

Froglike, reptilian.

Poor dingo.




A FREEBEE ...

How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

"Look, we can change the lightbulb. That I will tell you. We're changing it, ok? And I understand what you're saying, I hear it all the time. People call me and say "Is the lightbulb really dead?". Thats what they are asking me, its unbelievable. The lightbulb is in big trouble, that I can tell you. But we are going to change it."

"You know, I don't get as much credit for this as I should - And I mean this - Years ago - YEARS ago! I said ' We need to change this lightbulb!' And now its out! I couldn't have been more right, folks. And we will replace this bulb with the best bulb. The most bright, whitest light bulb you have seen."

"I know the best people, who are gonna screw this thing in. And then it's gonna be so bright, let me tell you, and people are gonna come from all around and go oooh! and they're going to say that it's the best light bulb they've ever seen."

"Look at Rubio, all he uses are fluorescent.Well, not with President Trump! We're going to use energy burning incandescent light bulbs. It will be 1000 watts of pure light. It'll be amazing! How do you think I have such great skin tone?"

[SOURCE: reddit. Kudos to several geniuses.]



Remember, that's TWO clickable labels: Trump and Nipples.
But only the second leads to enjoyable literature.
The first brings up garbage.
Trump.



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