Recently, new things have come crashing over my horizon, threatening to swamp me with uncomfortable emotions. Sorry, none of this has to with Pesach - none of the new crashing things is Pesach related.
EXCEL 2007
What a frekken' pain in the gandy parts this new and improved version of a beloved spreadsheet program turns out to be!
What did they do? Ask the drones in the Marketing Department how they wanted it to work? This new version changes things around in ways that ONLY the morons and mental-defectives in Marketing and Sales would consider good or useful.
News for Microsoft: beancounters use excel, hello? The folks in Marketing and Sales do NOT need a spreadsheet program, just give them some crayons and cardboard and they won't know any better, trust me.
I cannot wait until I get my old computer back, with the 2003 version of excel.
[I have been using excel since the late eighties. Kindly do not frek with something that I've known and loved for most of my working life. I also dream in excel, and if you mess with my dreams, you are asking for trouble. I know voodoo. I am just warning you.]
OBAMA IS A SPACE ALIEN
Or something. There is a group of nutballs out there who insist, against all evidence, that Obama was not born in Hawaii, but somewhere in Kenya. No matter how many sites link to verification of his birth-certificate, announcements and articles in the Honolulu newspapers, all major news sources and Fox News, and even the judiciary, these people keep rejecting all evidence, and forwarding shrill opinion pieces from World Net Daily and other far-out beach heads of the loony fringe that assert that Obama is a furrin'-born Indonesian Communist Mooslim Radical and that even if he was born in Hawaii (which they insist cannot have happened), that does not qualify as 'natural born'.
They do not offer any shred of evidence for their assertions, they merely reject everything that does not agree with their opinion.
[I do not know whether to laugh unpredictably like a hyena, and so disconcert the people around me, or skillfully nourish the paranoia of the writers who believe this crap, in hopes of sending them permanently off the edge of reality. My quandary is that I suspect that some true believers of this right-wing cargo-cult are actually in the Bay Area and on the same mailing list, and I don't want to wake them up to my utter heresy. You know how crazy people are.]
SAVAGE KITTEN IS A STONE FOX
Yes, I already knew this. But I saw her face from a new angle yesterday and was blown away. Again.
She's mine, do you hear me, mine mine mine! I found her first.
This new thing more than makes up for the uncomfortable emotions caused by the first two new things listed above.
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MAY GET DIZZY, DON'T GET PREGNANT
After picking up my refills I mentally calculated how often I've been to that pharmacy. More times than my years of age. Which is not su...
11 comments:
I'm assuming that savage kitten being a stone cold fox turns you on.
hmmmmmmmmmmm.
I didn't really get that vibe from you.
I mean, I got the panties vibe but not the quagmire vibe.
Quagmire from family guy.
"But I saw her face from a new angle yesterday and was blown away. Again."
I think its unbelievably sweet that after nearly 20 years together you are still finding things to learn and love about each other.
"And this, our life, exempt from public haunt,
Finds books in running brooks, tongues in trees, sermons in stone and good in everything.
I would not change it"
I'm really happy you (both) are part of our lives. Aside from the occassional saving of my life and saving my sanity, I'm just happy to have gotten to know you.
Excuse the nutrasweet/Hallmark sentiment. I'll now return to my regular sarcastic programing, already in progress.
Excel 2007 is the worst thing since sliced bread!
---Grant Patel
SAVAGE KITTEN IS A STONE FOXPikshures! We want pikshures!
---Grant Quagmire
And at this point, inevitably, I think of yoghurt and ghee. And a sprinkling of almonds, drizzle of honey.
---Grant Perverticon2007
But...that's my stapler...
And speaking of New Things of Dubious Merit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8i-OWDjOQfI
Other photos or panties - if either now it is me goose shit equal I say.
---Grant Patel
BOTH
You know...nothing says "I think you're a hot fox" more than giving your loved on a hot bath, drying her off, and then arranging bits of sushi on her bod to be lovingly consumed with chop sticks. Maybe even some oysters for later evening festivities.
'Course, you'd want to feed her lobster first. Just sayin'.
--Emilio L Platt
I mean, I got the panties vibe but not the quagmire vibe.
Quagmire from family guy.
That paints a mental picture of mister Atboth I did not want.
I would believe mister Patel is more Quagmire-ish. Atboth may be more like Kermit-the-Frog. At least I hope so.
02-24-2016
Please note: one of the prime disseminators of the Obama nonsense was BP, a member of SF4I, who for the next several years kept forwarding hateful bullshit to everybody in his e-mail address book, as well as private lists.
The injunction against lashon hara was not something he understood.
Since late 2012, when I resigned, I have scarce communicated with SF4I.
They ceased being relevant soon after, and were non-functioning by the end of the year.
Thanks, BP.
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