YOU OFFEND AUNTIE, YOU OFFEND ALL OF US

The consensus is clear: white boys shouldn't rap. Just don't do it, y'all are lousy, and ain't got rhythm. Stop. Fools. Especially the bros from Sales or the Marketing Department. And when I say "consensus", what I mean is myself and the bookseller. Plus, probably, every single Chinese person in the bar -- the pot head ("most dangerous man in Chinatown") wasn't in the place -- including the hairdresser and tough little sister.

Yeah, somebody died and left us in charge.

And all of y'all just ain't fly.


These two tunes particularly:

MEDINA

[SOURCE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vRZxBwiIjQ.]


POINTDEXTER!

[SOURCE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xy4FXhkm6Nw.]


If someone said y'all were "scrubs", you should have taken it to heart.


This one, you can have:

JAPANESE ARMY

[SOURCE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OENjmjTPGSw.]

It's perfect for your stormy jackboot of whiteness.
You sing, we hear Kansas and Ohio.
All cornfed and wet.



Auntie (姑媽 'gu ma'; father's older sister) is also tired of your screaming.
She's probably never heard the expression 'agida', but she instinctively knows that you are it.




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